Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


One of the consistent themes put forward by Team Kimberlin is that they are the victims of false narratives and that their defeats in court have been the result of unfair treatment by judges or cheating by the opposing parties. The Legal LULZ Du Jour from three years ago dealt with one example of such a silly claim. Note: The “Lynn” referred to in the first tweet is a woman who wound up getting a restraining order against Bill Schmalfeldt.

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Thus tweeteth the Cabin Boy™—dbr201512111512Zdbr201512111514ZLet’s see … the last time the Cabin Boy™ sued me … oh, yeah, that was the LOLsuit in the Circuit Court for Howard County. Now, how did that go?

Yeah, I remember now. Judge Kramer dismissed the suit against the out-of-state defendants because The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt had failed to serve them, and she dismissed the case against me because I was being sued in the wrong county. Now, I’m pretty sure that I told the judge that I lived in Carroll County and didn’t work in Howard County, and I didn’t lie about that.

Hmmmm.dbr201512111516ZIt must be some technicality under Acme Law that makes living outside of Howard County a form of cheating. Still, I don’t remember any sense of humiliation as a result of winning.

Perhaps I’m not the one with a progressive brain disorder.

UPDATE—dbr201515111732Z

*yawn*

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The Truth is not Team Kimberlin’s friend.

Oh, and the Cabin Boy™ sued me once more. I was a defendant in LOLsuit VIII: Avoiding Contact. That case was dismissed against me because of the court’s lack of personal jurisdiction, i.e., Schmalfeldt sued me in the wrong court. Again.

Come to think of it, the state law claims that The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin tried to bring against me in the RICO Madness and RICO 2: Electric Boogaloo LOLsuits were also dismissed because the U. S. District Court lacked jurisdiction. The RICO Retread LOLsuit could have been dismissed in state court for improper venue, but the judge dismissed it for failure to state a claim in order for the dismissal to be with prejudice.

Incompetent cases filed in the wrong courts. It’s almost as if there’s a pattern here.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


The biggest problem that Team Kimberlin has had with their LOLsuits is their lack of understanding about how to plead the who, what, when, and where of the various elements of the torts they have alleged. The TKPOTD from three years ago today dealt with The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s inability to properly allege anything against me in the RICO Retread LOLsuit.

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I originally wasn’t the central character in the Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s RICO Retread LOLsuit in the Circuit Court for Montgomery County, but after the hearing on 3 September, 2015, TDPK moved me to the center of the alleged conspiracy. Here’s why.

THE COURT: Okay, so what I will do is I’m not going to rule or decide your motion one way or the other, because as it’s currently pled I think it’s insufficient for me to decide whether he’s got a claim against Hoge or not. So I’m going to allow him to amend as to Mr. Hoge to see if he can allege something specifically that he has done without and actually I won’t decide this one way or the other. So we’ll just wait until he files his amended complaint and then I’ll take up well actually I guess you have to refile it as to the amended complaint. But I’ll leave this for the time being sitting here because if I dismiss the complaint as you then everything else goes automatically and we might as well dispose of some of these other things that we have this morning.

MR. OSTRONIC [My Lawyer]: Do you have a time, Your Honor?

THE COURT: Fifteen days ought to be — I mean, this has been kicking around for years.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Yeah, that’s fine.

THE COURT: Okay, so you’ve got 15 days.

MR. KIMBERLIN: That’s perfect.

THE COURT: But keep in mind it can’t be complaints to officials requesting investigation.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Right.

THE COURT: It can’t be coming to court.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Right.

THE COURT: It has to be something specific that he said —

MR. KIMBERLIN: All right.

THE COURT: — that accuses you of committing crime, not past crimes you’ve been convicted of —

MR. KIMBERLIN: Right.

THE COURT: — but some —

MR. KIMBERLIN: Some new crime.

THE COURT: And it has to be, you know, not a suggestion. His opinion that maybe you or people with you might be behind this. If it’s couched like that it’s not going to be enough so —

MR. KIMBERLIN: Right.

MR. OSTRONIC: Your Honor, will it also have to be conspiratorial?

THE COURT: Pardon me?

MR. OSTRONIC: It has to be conspiracy too, correct, he has to allege the elements of conspiracy?

THE COURT: If he wants to bring the other people in with it. But if he alleges your client defamed to him —

MR. OSTRONIC: Then this wouldn’t be the proper venue.

THE COURT: Well, if he has anybody else that he can tie to that. I mean, if there’s more than one defendant he can make that argument, okay.

MR. OSTRONIC: Thank you, Your Honor.

THE COURT: Yes, I mean if all you’re left with is Mr. Hoge, he’s right, then you’ve got to go to Carroll County.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Right.

His amended complaint was pretty slipshod. We’ll see what the court thinks of it soon enough.

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In some ways TDPK’s amended complaint was worse than his original. Every one of his allegations against me involved my asking the authorities to conduct an investigation, an my expression of protected opinion, or something barred by res judicata because of the previous Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. LOLsuit. In fact, the suit wound up being dismissed against me on the basis of res judicata.

TDPK once claimed in an email to Patrick Frey that he had filed over a hundred lawsuits. He lost the vast majority of them.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin has constantly whined about the “false narratives” being used to defame him. In reality, his LOLsuits have been nothing but made-up stories spun without any supporting evidence. The TKPOTD from four years ago today cited one example.

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The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin has about two-and-a-half weeks left to try to find enough well-plead allegations in his second amended complaint to cobble together the elements of at least one of the counts for his Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness. If he wants to keep me as a defendant, he has to make one of the three federal claims work. That’s because he and I are both residents of Maryland, and he can’t sue me in federal court if all he has are state law claims.

Here’s one of the allegations he might try to use to support one of the federal counts—ECF 135-99

So what? FBI agents interview people all the time. Considering that three people, Patrick Frey, Erick Erickson, and Aaron Walker, who had criticized Brett Kimberlin or beat him in court had been SWATted, asking TDPK what he might know about the situation was not an unreasonable thing for someone investigating those SWATtings to do.

So far as I know, no one has every specifically accused Brett Kimberlin of making those SWATting calls or having another person do it for him. I can understand why someone might be suspicious. As Ian Fleming famously wrote: “Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.”

timer-blackTDPK has whined a lot about “false narratives,” but he’s never specified which defendant said what when to whom in any way that actually accused him of being the SWATter. That’s not in his original, first amended, or second amended complaints. He’s not supposed to get any more amendments, so it’s too late to change his tale. Time is ticking down.

Of course, he could just dismiss the suit, but his ego probably won’t permit that.

Stay tuned.

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Of course, the federal counts Kimberlin’s RICO Madness LOLsuit were dismissed against me for failure to state a claim upon which relief could be granted, and his follow state RICO Retread LOLsuit was dismissed for the same reason.

False narratives. I wonder how TDPK would characterize the bogus documents he bought for $9,000 back in 2017.

UPDATE—Oh, look! Mr. Down Twinkles is back and has hit the Thumbs Down button.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


Perhaps one of the reasons that The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin has been slacking off on his promise of lawsuits “for the rest of their lives” against the original defendants in the Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. nuisance LOLsuit is that he’s figured out that he can’t beat us. After he made the mistake of calling Stacy McCain as witness in the first LOLsuit (never try to outcrazy Stacy McCain), he dropped Stacy from the cases filed after August, 2014. After he lost both the federal and state Kimberlin v. National Bloggers Club, et al. RICO Madness and RICO Retread LOLsuits, he dropped Ali Alexander and Aaron Walker from further cases. Finally, after losing the Kimberlin v. Hunton & Williams, et al. RICO 2: Electric Boogaloo LOLsuit, he dropped me from the follow-on RICO 2 Retread state case.

The RICO 2 Retread LOLsuit sputtered, and by this time a couple of years ago, it was on its last leg as was reported in the TKPOTD from two years ago today.

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The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin has filed a motion seeking a postponement of the motions hearing scheduled for 15 November in the Kimberlin v. Hunton & Williams LLP, et al. (II) RICO 2 Retread LOLsuit. That’s the state version of the Team Themis LOLsuit filed in the Circuit Court for Montgomery County. The only remaining defendants are Bill Nickless, Battelle (the not-for-profit that runs Pacific Northwest National Labs for the Department of Energy), and some John Does. Judge Mason hasn’t granted his motion yet, so it looks as if the remaining motions to dismiss will be heard next week, and another of TDPK’s LOLsuits should bite the dust.

We’ll see.

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We didn’t have to wait long. Not long thereafter, the case docket showed that Kimberlin had voluntarily dismissed the LOLsuit against those defendants. And then he failed to follow through with an appeal.

Maybe he was lying when he promised lawsuits “for the rest of their lives.” He is a convicted perjurer, you know.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s campaign of lawfare as a form of brass knuckles reputation management has failed miserably. The  TKPOTD from four years ago today shows how his LOLsuits claim that he had been defamed wound up getting a court to find that his reputation was so bad that there was no way to lower it.

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One of the things The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin has sued me and many others about is defamation. In my defense, I have argued that TDPK’s reputation is so poor because of his past criminal convictions that he is defamation proof. TDPK keeps trying to deny that. For example, he wrote this in one of his filings in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness LOLsuit—BK_ECF29-14

Now, Aaron Walker and I aren’t the only defendants in TDPK’s lawfare nuisance suits who have argued his status as defamation proof. This is from Michelle Malkin’s and Twitchy’s recently granted motion to dismiss in the Kimberlin v. Most of the Universe, et al. RICO Retread LOLsuit—Malkin_Twitchy MTD p7

Judge Mason agreed with Michelle Malkin and Twitchy. He adopted their argument in dismissing them from the case. Thus, we now have a ruling finding that Brett Kimberlin is defamation proof.

It would be interesting to know how TDPK evaluates the success and cost/benefit ratio of his brass knuckles reputation management now.

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Come to think of it, is there any member of Team Kimberlin who isn’t defamation proof?

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin started his campaign of lawfare against the First Amendment rights of people who spoke and wrote truthfully about him in a futile attempt at brass knuckles reputation management. Of course, his LOLsuits blew up in his face (Yeah, I typed that on purpose), and his inept litigation became a reliable source of pointage, laughery, and mockification. As the TKPOTD from three years ago shows, one of his consistent failings was making self-contradictory claims in his court filings.

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Here’s another example of how The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin is unable to keep his stories straight. This is a portion of a paragraph in a recent filing he made in the Kimberlin v. Most of the Universe, et al. RICO Retread LOLsuit.M2Recon_p?If the Gentle Reader were to type that URL into his browser, he would be taken to this YouTube video.GB_AW_youtubeNote the date that the video was published—25 May, 2012, the date of Everyone Blog About Brett Kimberlin Day. That’s the day Aaron Walker was interviewed by Glenn Beck, and Kimberlin states in his filing that Aaron appeared on that program and asserted that Kimberlin had SWATted him.

That was a pretty neat trick on Aaron’s part because he wasn’t SWATted until a month later, on the same day as the Montgomery Circuit Court threw out the unconstitutional gag order that had been imposed by the District Court. TDPK admits this in the complaint he filed to initiate the LOLsuit.Retread Complaint-75Brett Kimberlin is not only a liar, he’s a very bad one who can’t keep his stories straight.

TardisThis made up nonsense about Aaron accusing TDPK of SWATting him a month before Aaron was actually SWATted is only the most glaringly obvious false and self-contradictory allegation in TDPK’s filings.There are many more, and they will all come back to bite him. Self-contractidory claims are not entitled to a presumption of truth.

And, no, I haven’t been lending out my time machine.

Stay tuned.

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As so many judges have found, “The Plaintiff has failed …”

Well, TDPK did succeed in one thing with his RICO Retread LOLsuit. He managed to see the court find that his reputation was so bad that there was no way to lower it—that he is defamation proof.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


For the past few days, we’ve been looking at The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s inept presentation of his case during the Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. LOLsuit. He kept trying to bring in non-germane topics. The TKPOTD from four years ago today dealt with his attempt to bring up the legal assistance fund I started to help Tetyana Kimberlin, something that had nothing to do with alleged defamation of TDPK.

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During last month’s Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. trial, The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin seemed particularly interested in the help that Aaron Walker and I had provided to Mrs. Kimberlin. This was part of his questioning of Aaron Walker.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Now, you — after you helped my wife file these things, you create with Mr. Hoge, am I correct? A defense fund for my wife, to raise money for her?

MR. WALKER: That is correct.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And you hired — you raised how much? A thousand? $100 —

MR. WALKER: I don’t know. I did not — personally control the funds.

MR. KIMBERLIN: But suffice it to say, it was a fairly significant amount.

MR. WALKER: Well —

MR. OSTRONIC: Objection.

THE COURT: Sustained.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And you used that money to hire an attorney, another attorney, to represent my wife.

MR. WALKER: I did not use the money. As I recall, John Hoge decided to loan several thousand dollars to your wife to help her get an attorney, and as of last I heard, he’s still in the red on that.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Oh, he loaned it to her? Okay —

MR. WALKER: Well, I don’t — no. It’s not a loan to her. We were hoping that he would get it back from donors.

When he got me on the witness stand he asked me about the fund as well.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And as a result of that email thread, did you terminate the defense fund that you had raised, or started for her?

MR. OSTRONIC: Objection, your honor. I —

THE COURT: Sustained.

MR. OSTRONIC: Thank you.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Did you take any action after you received that email?

MR. HOGE: I don’t know which email you’re talking about, so I — you would have to show me the email, and then I can tell you what action I might have taken as a result of it.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Now, you with my wife after the hearing. Am I correct?

MR. HOGE: Yes.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And as a result of that meeting, you created a defense fund. Am I correct?

MR. HOGE: Not as an immediate result of that meeting. Not our first meeting. No.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Did my wife ever tell you —

MR. OSTRONIC: Objection.

THE COURT: Sustained.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Did you stop that defense fund at some point in time?

MR. HOGE: Yes.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And was that on account of her?

MR. HOGE: At her request.

MR. KIMBERLIN: And at that time, did she ask you to remove any post about —

MR. OSTRONIC: Objection.

THE COURT: Sustained. The objection’s sustained.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Your honor, it goes to malice.

THE COURT: Well, it’s hearsay. He can’t testify what she said. She’s not part in this case.

He got back around to the topic of the legal fund for his wife on redirect examination.

MR. KIMBERLIN: You’ve been to events with Mr. Akbar?

MR. HOGE: Yes.

MR. KIMBERLIN: You’ve been nominated for awards by the National Blogger’s club for writing about me. Right?

MR. HOGE: Yes.

MR. KIMBERLIN: You coordinated with Mr. Akbar to raise funds for this Tetyana defense fund. Am I correct?

MR. HOGE: He volunteered to be a contributor. He wasn’t involved in starting the fund.

Gentle Reader, I suspect that what triggered the Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. vexatious lawsuit was the help we offered Mrs. Kimberlin. Brett Kimberlin made his family issues public when he sought a protective order against his estranged wife and a peace order and criminal charges against her boyfriend. His lawfare against them backfired, and his attempt at brass knuckles reputation management by suing Aaron, Stacy, Ali, KU, and me has resulted in an extra helping of Streisand Effect.

Just wait till he sees what’s coming in the RICO Madness.

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He did even worse in the RICO Madness case. The federal counts were thrown out for failure to state a claim, and when he refiled the state law claims in state court, he wound up being adjudicated defamation proof.

Everything proceeded as I had foreseen.