Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

One common characteristic among the members of Team Kimberlin is a lack of musical talent. Rather than admit his inadequacy, The Dread Deadbeat Performer Kimberlin has tried to sue some of us who have commented on his musicianship. The TKPOTD from four years ago today dealt with his claim in his RICO Madness LOLsuit that my codefendants and I had tried to ruin his career.

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The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin tries to claim that my 21 codefendants and I did all sorts of mean things to him to ruin his business. This is from paragraph 265 of his second amended complaint in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness.ECF 135-265Now, it is true that I have written a negative review of his musicianship.

Review: “Nothing Else” by Epoxy (#BrettKimberlin)

Originally posted on 17 July, 2012

Back in 2002, Brett Kimberlin fronted a band named Epoxy and released a CD called Nothing Else. The story he spun promoting the album was that it contained songs that he had written while he was being held as a political prisoner in the federal prison system.

The band consisted of Brett Kimberlin on guitar and vocals, Wade Matthews on Bass, and Robbie White on Drums. The genre of the album is someplace between grunge and punk, neither of which are among my favorite musical forms.

Let me first comment on Mr. Kimberlin’s voice. I had heard his speaking voice in court, and I understand why some people refer to it as whinny. His singing voice reminds me of the silly voice that Weird Al uses on tracks such as Eat It. Mrs. Hoge, who listened through the CD with me, said, “Eddie Haskell.” On most of the tracks his voice was off key, usually flat.

Most of the songs could have been filler tracks on a generic grunge album. Some of the alienation in them seems to be more appropriate for a 17 year old, not someone 30 years older. Mr. Kimberlin was in his late 40s when the recording was made. However, three of the songs stood out. Vicegrip was actually interesting musically. Donuts had clever lyrics. It’s about lousy prison food and would probably get a nod of approval from G. Gordon Liddy.

Then there’s the last cut Keyhole. It was outstandingly bad. Mrs. Hoge and I met while we were in the music business, and during her career as a recording engineer, she recorded more gold and platinum records than I did. Her comment was, “If you’re gonna mike a guitar that close, you should use a better guitar and make sure it’s in tune. And get a better guitar player.”

While he didn’t do especially well with the acoustic guitar on Keyhole, Brett Kimberlin is actually a reasonably good guitarist. He probably couldn’t cut it in Nashville or LA, but could make a living in a minor market (such as Seattle) or playing the Holiday Inn circuit. Indeed, the world would be a better place if he did ignore the usual advice and give up his day job.

Nothing Else by Epoxy (Pollen Records, $16.04 from Amazon) is interesting because of who recorded it, but I can’t honestly recommend it for the musical experience it offers.

The CD is no longer reliably available on Amazon

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The original publication of that review resulted in Hogewash!‘s first Instalanche. There were probably more hits on that review over the next couple of days than on the jtmp dot org website for the next year.

The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s plan for brass knuckles reputation management wasn’t any better than his music.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

For all the whining that Team Kimberlin does about false narratives, you’d think they’d do a better job of spinning their tales. However, their such bad liars that catching them is usually trivially easy. The TKPODT from four years ago shows one example.

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Here’s part of the story The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin tried to spin for the court when he got caught forging a summons in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness.ECF 102-3The sharp-eyed Gentle Reader should note two things in that clipping. First, TDPK claims that the Clerk sent him 21 summonses. Second, the clipping wraps between two pages of the docket entry, so the Electronic Comment Filing System tag is visible. Notice that is shows the number of pages in the docket item.

Here’s the ECF tag for the docket item posted by the Clerk that shows all of the summonses issued.ECF 4

Each summons is one page long. Therefore, the number of summonses issued was …?

Let’s not always see the same hands.

That’s right! 18.

BTW, an earlier docket item shows the proposed summonses that TDPK sent to the court. There are 19 of them. Can you guess which one the Clerk didn’t issue?

That’s right, the one for Twitchy. Perhaps because Twitchy was not listed in the caption of the lawsuit as a defendant.

Still, with only 19 proposed summonses submitted, where does TDPK come up with the expectation of 21. Well, he did leave a couple of defendants listed in the caption off of his list of summonsees: Kimberlin Unmasked and Mandy Nagy.


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Math is hard. So is the Truth.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

As the TKPOTD from four years ago today noted, one of the defenses raised in The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s LOLsuits was the fact that his reputation as a convicted serial bomber is so bad that he can’t be defamed.

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The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin haz sad because people have said mean things about him. His sad got so big that he up and sued Aaron Walker, Stacy McCain, Ali Akbar, Kimberlin Unmasked and me for a million bucks (Kimberlin v. Walker, et al.). When the five of us didn’t roll over, TDPK’s sad got sooooooo big that sued the five of us plus a bunch of other folk too—National Bloggers Club, Patrick Frey, Erick Erickson, Michelle Malkin, Glenn Beck, Lee Stranahan, James O’Keefe, Mandy Nagy, DB Capitol Strategies, The Franklin Center, Simon & Shuster, Mercury Radio Arts, The Blaze, Ace of Spades, RedState, and something he called “”—for another million dollars (Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al., aka RICO Madness). Now, TDPK’s sad has swelled to the point that he wants to add even more defendants—Twitchy, Dan Backer, and The American Spectator—and up the ante changed his money demand to $2,000.000!!!!!!!111!!

However, TDPK has a problem suing for defamation, and that’s his existing reputation. Mark Bailen, the lawyer for James O’Keefe, Simon & Shuster, Erick Erickson, and RedState put it this way …ECF 87-p21

Reputation, reputation, reputation! Oh, I have lost my reputation! I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial.

—Cassio in Othello II, iii, 265

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Judge Hazel dismissed TDPK’s state law defamation claim in the federal RICO Madness LOLsuit for lack of jurisdiction, and Judge Johnson granted judgment for the defendants at the state Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. trial because Kimberlin failed to offer any evidence that we had made any false statement, a required element of a defamation case. However, Judge Mason dismissed the RICO Retread LOLsuit in part because he found that Brett Kimberlin is, in fact, defamation proof.

And so, The Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s attempt to use lawfare for brass knuckles reputation management backfired and resulted in a court finding that his reputation is sufficiently bad that there’s no way it can be lowered.

Everything proceeded as I had foreseen.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin must not have a very creative imagination because he keeps trying to recycle the same debunked stories. The tall tale that was the subject of the TKPOTD from four years ago today kept reappearing. It was featured prominently in TDPK’s filings in the Hoge v. Kimberlin, et al. lawsuit.

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It’s hard to choose from among so many, but this may be my favorite of the whoppers that The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin has included in his pleadings filed in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness. The “reporter” he mentions is Bill Schmalfeldt.ECF 49-3The Gentle Reader who has been following the Cabin Boy’s™ antics for the past year or so may wonder if TDPK hasn’t ascribed obsessive and bizarre conduct to the wrong person. It’s the “reporter” who is subject to a peace order, not me. It’s the “reporter” who violated the order over 400 time in less than a month.

For the record—I was not forced to participate in mediation with the Cabin Boy™, but as a result of the mediation, I agreed to ask the State’s Attorney’s Office to drop the charges in exchange for Schmalfeldt’s agreeing to abide by the peace order and drop his appeal of the extension. He has reneged. I didn’t.

Why, I wonder, did TDPK feel threatened by my efforts to see the peace order enforced? Hmmmm. That might be an interesting question for a deposition, if the RICO Madness goes that far.

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It doesn’t matter how Team Kimberlin has tired to spin that story—in TPDK’s court filings, in the Cabin Boy’s™ LOLsuits, in Breitbart Unmasked Bunny Billy Boy Brett Unread, or in Karoli Kun’s smear piece in Crooks & Liars—the lie has failed to gain any traction. Indeed, their inept telling and retelling of it has fueled a great deal of pointage, laughery, and mockification.

And the mockery continues.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

One of the reasons that every one of the Team Kimberlin LOLsuits filed since 2012 have failed is that The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin and The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt routinely make statements or file paper which contradict previous statements or filings. They’ve even been know to submit exhibits that contradict the filings to which they are attached. The TKPOTD from four years ago today cites one example of TDPK’s inability to keep his lies straight.

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The following is from The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s “Response to Defendant Twitchy’s Memorandum” filed on 9 May in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness.ECF 125-unrelatedWhat TDPK was ranting about was the filing of a state court transcript with the federal court. He’s claiming that the state case, Kimberlin v. Walker, et al., Case No. 380966V, is not related to the federal case. However, on 17 January, TDPK filed this in RICO case.ECF 32-opening

Mark Twain once observed that if you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember what you said.

Do perjurers ever tell the truth?

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False narrative, huh?

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Napoleon once noted that one should not correct one’s enemy while his is making a mistake. The TKPOTD from four years ago today provides an example of that principle.

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Last Friday, The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin sent a letter to Judge Grimm seeking permission to file the proposed Rule 11 sanctions motion which he served on Michael Smith, the lawyer representing Michelle Malkin and Twitchy in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness. He also filed a pleading called Plaintiff’s Response to Defendant Twitchy’s Memorandum.

The lack of attention to detail is stunning.

First, Judge Grimm’s case management order specifically requires that the title of each opposition or reply paper refer to the pleading it addresses by name and docket number. Several memoranda have been filed on Twitchy’s behalf, but TDPK doesn’t say which he is responding to.

Second, Twitchy isn’t yet a party to the lawsuit. You can look it up on PACER; Twitchy’s not listed. It won’t be a party until after TDPK’s second amended complaint is accepted. If it is accepted.

Third, as I’ve mentioned before, TDPK seemed to be having trouble remembering who is the plaintiff planitiff and who is the defendant in the suit.

Fourth, in an earlier order Judge Grimm said that papers that were not properly served on opposing parties would not be accepted. Guess what? TDPK has diddled with service on both his pleadings filed last Friday.

The version of the certificate of service for his response to the Twitchy memorandum that was filed with the court looks like this.ECF 125-certThe version mailed to me looks like this.ECF 125-cert_mailedNote the date change. He’s told the court one thing and acts as if he thinks he can get me to believe something else.

Here’s what the envelope looks like. Note that it is postmarked on the 12th.BKenvelope20140512Here’s what the first paragraph of the letter about Rule 11 sanctions that was filed with the court looks like. Note the handwritten correction.ECF 126-1Here’s what the same paragraph looks like in the version of the letter sent to me.ECF 126-1_mailedThe handwritten correction is missing, and so are Exhibits A and B in the package sent to me.

All this presents an interesting quandary to me. I could seek permission from Judge Grimm to point out how Kimberlin is still diddling with service in violation of the his instructions. That would probably get some of TDPK’s stuff thrown out. OTOH, these pleadings are so poorly written that I believe they actually help my case. It’s probably in my best interest for Judge Grimm to read this dreck.

For now, at least, I’ll do nothing to rescue TDPK from his own folly.

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Everything proceeded as I had foreseen.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin lost all of the LOLsuits he’s filed since the beginning of 2012 for three reason. First, the facts were against him. Second, the law was against him. Third, his disregard for the Rules of Civil Proceedure doomed many of his filings. The TKPOTD from four years ago today dealt with a filing in the RICO Madness LOLsuit that hit that trifecta.

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Both of The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s vexatious lawsuits in which I am a defendant are grinding their ways through the state and federal courts. Given the frivolous nature of TDPK’s complaints, I have optimistic expectations concerning the final results of the suits. There have been several recent developments that lead me to believe that Brett Kimberlin is becoming desperate. Indeed, it seems that panic has driven him to turn the stupid knob up to <del>11</del> 12.

All is proceeding as I have foreseen—and I hope to be able to share the details of some of TDPK’s latest mistakes before long.

Stay tuned.

UPDATE—As I’ve noted above, good legal strategy prevents me from publishing everything I know about. However, I’ve been given clearance to share this example of TDPK’s going full-Acme.

IANAL, I’m an engineer. I’m not sure how lawyers would describe that proposed motion, but we engineers would categorize it as bullshit.

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The facts were against him. He really did alter the evidence presented in the Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. LOLsuit.

The law was against him. Michael Smith, representing Michelle Malkin and Twitchy, was not out of line providing the federal court with evidence of TDPK’s altering of documents in the state case. His motion related a forged summons in the federal case.

And TDPK blew his motion by failing to follow the timing required by Federal Rule of Civil Procedure 11. The rule requires that the target of the motion be served a copy 21 days before it is filed with the court in order allow him to correct his error. The Malkin motion that Kimberlin was bitching about was filed on 28 April. Kimberlin filed his sanctions motion on 7 May and claimed that was when he had served Michael Smith. Only 9 days had elapsed.

He definitely got in over his head.