Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


Bill Schmalfeldt got in over his head when he signed up to be one of Brett Kimberlin’s PR flacks. I’ve never figured out exactly why he followed in The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s lawfare footsteps and began filing LOLsuit, but he did. I was a defendant in four of them and the lead defendant in two, LOLsuits I and IV. During the course of LOLsuit IV, Schmalfeldt got upset with me because I was interested in his communications with my codefendants, especially the anonymous blogger known as Paul Krendler. The TKPOTD for five years ago today engaged in a bit of pointage, laughery, and mockification of the Cabin Boy™.

* * * * *

The Cabin Boy™ routinely sticks his nose into other people’s business, and he acts as if he believes that everyone else does the same.BotM201503282229Z

popcorn4bkThe Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt may have forgotten who he’s suing, but “Paul Krendler” is among the et al. in his Schmalfeldt v. Hoge, et al. LOLsuit2 that he’s filed in Howard County Circuit Court. That being the case, I have a interest in his communications with my codefendants. It was TDPS who made his communications with “Krendler” my business.

Stupid is as stupid does.

* * * * *

LOLsuit IV saw a Maryland state court suit. Because Schmalfeldt didn’t effect service of process on any of the out-of-state defendants, and because with me as the only remaining  defendant, proper venue for the case was in my home county Carroll County. However, he had filed in Howard County. With those facts before the court, the judge found that she lacked jurisdiction over the case and dismissed it without have to bother deciding if the Cabin Boy™ had actually stated a claim upon which relief could be granted.

Everything proceed as I had foreseen.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


Several of the Gentle Readers have remarked that many episodes of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign (like this one from four years ago today) seem to have been inspired by events in Real Life.

* * * * *

Johnny Atsign Logo 2ANNOUNCER: From Westminster, it’s time for—

SOUND: Skype rings once. Telephone receiver picked up.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) Hi, Johnny. We haven’t talked for a while.

JOHNNY: Well, I’ve been kinda busy.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) So I see. Most of the noise on the Internet has been from The Grouch, but I’m wondering about what The Bomber is up to.

JOHNNY: No good.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) That’s a given, but what more can you tell me?

MUSIC: Theme up and under.

ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …

JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

MUSIC: Theme up to music out. Continue reading

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


There’s an old saying about one picture being worth a thousand words. Sometimes, a picture can generate thousands of words. This episode fo Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign from three years ago today is about such pictures.

* * * * *

ANNOUNCER: From Westminster, it’s time for—

SOUND: Cell phone rings once.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) Good afternoon, Johnny. Whatcha doin’?

JOHNNY: Hi. I’m not doing anything.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) Nothing?

JOHNNY: Well, I’m drinking a cup of coffee, but otherwise, I’m taking a day off.

RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) You may want to take a look at The Grouch’s Twitter feed.

MUSIC: Theme up and under.

ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …

JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

MUSIC: Theme up to music out. Continue reading

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


I believe that I’m mentioned before that the members of Team Kimberlin are liars. The odd thing about their lying is their massive incompetence at it. You’d think that anyone with as much practice would eventually learn how to tell a decent whooper. Their lies about their LOLsuits and the in the court papers they filed resulted in an ongoing set of posts titled Prevarication Du Jour. This one ran four years ago today.

* * * * *

Ahem.RD201603261501ZSo the Cabin Boy™ believes that my characterization of Judge Joseph’s order constitutes a lie. Well, I suppose he’s entitled to that belief. However, he’s mistaken.

The Gentle Reader should note that I did not present the underlined words as a direct quote from the judge, but as a summary. She ordered the parties—both plaintiff and defendants—to stop filing paperwork until she could rule on the pending motion to dismiss. That would include things such as the Cabin Boy’s™ motion to disqualify counsel and the defendants’ opposition. It would include stuff such as the paperwork the Cabin Boy™ filed last Monday and any defense responses that would be necessary. Thus, I believe that an impartial observer would find that my words are, in fact, a reasonable summary of the judge’s order.

* * * * *

You’d think that someone alleged to have GS-13 editorial skills would have better reading comprehension.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


After Bill Schmalfeldt fled Maryland after losing LOLsuits III, IV, and V in rapid succession, he spent a bit more than a year in Milwaukee where he lost LOLsuits VI. He then moved on to his hometown of Clinton, Iowa, where he was briefly employed as a disk jockey at a local FM station. That gig didn’t last long, and his failure to keep the job was the subject of some pointage, laughery, and mockification in the comments here at Hogewash!, and that, of course, prompted an outburst from the Cabin Boy™ which was chronicled in a post titled Hilarious? Hilarious How? which ran three years ago today.

* * * * *

What does he mean I’m hilarious? What does he mean, the way I talk? What? Hilarious how? What’s hilarious about it? Hilarious how? Let me understand this, because, ya’ know, maybe it’s me, but I’m hilarious how? Hilarious like a clown? I amuse him? I make him laugh? I’m here to amuse him? Hilarious how? How am I hilarious? What’s so hilarious about me? What’s hilarious?

* * * * *

Actually, what’s hilarious is the Cabin Boy’s™ poor reading comprehension. I haven’t written anything here at Hogewash! about his being fired from his most recent job, but I will now note that he no longer seems be working an afternoon announcing gig at KMCN. OTOH, the Cabin Boy™ has plenty of experience never being impeded by not knowing what he’s talking about.

Failing failures gotta fail.

* * * * *

That post parodied a scene from Goodfellas, a movie containing a putdown line that Schmalfeldt often used. Given the number of jobs that have slipped through the Cabin Boy’s™ fingers over the past three years, something like a shoe shine box might be a reasonable investment for him as a way to pickup a bit of cash.

For the moment, he’s employed again. There are still some dates left on the calendar in the break area.

Tea Kimberlin Post of the Day


Here’s a early episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign. It first ran six years ago today.

* * * * *

Johnny Atsign Logo 2ANNOUNCER: From Westminster, it’s time for—

SOUND: Skype rings once.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

PRO BONO: (Telephone Filter) Good morning, Mr. Atsign. I’m the pro bono lawyer representing the defendants in The Bomber’s state lawsuit.

JOHNNY: Hello. Aaron told me you would be calling. Call me Johnny.

PRO BONO: (Telephone Filter) OK, Johnny. When can we meet?

JOHNNY: My schedule is pretty open today.

PRO BONO: (Telephone Filter) Fine. Let’s meet at my office at 3. There are some things that need confirmation.

MUSIC: Theme up and under.

ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …

JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

Continue reading

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


One of the reasons that Brett Kimberlin’s brass knuckles reputation management LOLsuits have failed is that he’s consistently bitten off more than he can chew. The TKPOTD from five years ago today takes note of his choice of defendants in the RICO 2: Electric Boogaloo LOLsuit include folks with the resources to effectively crush his case.

* * * * *

popcorn4bkSeveral people have pointed out that the lead defendant in The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s RICO2 LOLsuit (Kimberlin v. Team Themis, et al.) is a law firm with 800 or so lawyers on staff.

The other interesting defendant is Pacific Northwest National Laboratories which is a part of the U. S. Department of Energy. TDPK has filed suit against the federal government.

* * * * *

His grandiose claims not withstanding, The Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin’s problem hasn’t been delusions of grandeur so much as delusions of adequacy.