Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

During one of Matt Osborne’s turns at running the Breitbart Unmasked website, he tried, quite unsuccessfully, to turn it into something approximating a real news site. But of course, he couldn’t refrain from an occasional attack on those of use continuing to report on the site’s owner. This post appeared on BU nine years ago today.The link to that ABCNews post has expired. Following the expired links to several other ABC posts, Osborne concludes with this—

Transpose the issues presented here from the physical neighborhood to the electronic one. Aaron Walker Stalker will bulldoze your fence rather than slow down at the turn of his driveway. William Hoge will call the police because your grass is an inch too high. R.S. McCain will declare himself the victim of your shenanigans, then shine his laser into your windows the minute your back has turned. All of this is made worse by the internet, which rewards negativity, dishonest argument, and “link baiting” over factual journalism or a conciliatory narrative. Everyone feels completely justified in their actions, no matter how obscene or over-the-top, because the other guy is the one truly at fault just by virtue of his being there.

That bit about feeling justified no matter how obscene one’s action probably fits another former editor of BU better than anyone me mentioned in Osborne’s rant. OTOH, self-awareness has never been one of Team Kimberlin’s strong suits.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

One of the problems that The Deadbeat Publisher Kimberlin has had with his Breitbart Unmasked website is finding a competent editor to keep it running. Bill Schmalfeldt and Matt Osborne have both failed at the job—Schmalfeldt more than once. Indeed, the Cabin Boy’s™ last turn left the site in such bad shape that no one has bothered to post anything new for almost four years. In fact, some of the posts have been memory holed. That’s not the first time BU has been subjected to an editorial cleaning. The TKPOTD for six years ago today dealt with the clean up that occurred after Schmalfeldt’s first tune as editor.

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The Cabin Boy™ was editor of Breitbart Unmasked for while before 57F Osborne took over and turned it into Bunny Boy Unread. The site is backed up all the way to a 21 February, 2012 post by The Watchful Avenge called THE OCCUPY UNMASKED LIE. That post is still available on the Breitbart Unmasked Bunny Boy Unread website, but a significant number of posts from the Cabin Boy™ era have been memory-holed. For example, these posts from the last month before Schmalfeldt was fired have been spoliated—


Of course, these are all backed up both online and offline. So has essentially everything that has been posted to the site.

When one buys pixels by the terabyte, a few gigabytes don’t even amount to pocket change.

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For the record, there have been over 24,000 post here at Hogewash!, and all of them are still online—except for one, the donation page for the fund that was created to support Tetyana Kimberlin’s legal expenses when she was seeking protection from her husband. The page was taken down when the fund was suspended at her request.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

It’s been said The Sage of The Dread Deadbeat Pirate Pro-Se Kimberlin is much like a bad movie. At one point in an unusually bad fit of poor self-awareness, Matt Osborne (writing under the pseudonym Xenophon) was using Amazing Criswell posts at Breitbart Unmasked to predict the direst of dire direness for people who had been reporting on Kimberlin’s activities. Nine years ago today, I published the post, The Amazing Xenophon.

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Over at Breitbart Unmasked (No, I won’t link to it.), Xenophon has been trying impress both of the site’s regular readers with the idea that she is this generation’s Amazing Criswell. The real Amazing Criswell was a local TV personality in LA back in the ’50s. What little fame he had in the wider world was from his appearances in the Ed Wood howler, Plan 9 from Outer Space, and on the Jack Parr Show.

Criswell’s bating average on his predictions was someplace south of 0.0005, and that is only slightly better than Xenophon’s, so it’s not unreasonable for her to aspire to be in the same league.

There’s another similarity between Team Kimberlin and Criswell. Criswell originally bought time on TV for infomercials for his vitamin business, and that’s kinda like selling drugs.

Oh, one more thing …

Criswell wore bow ties.

UPDATE—Apparently, Matt Osborne thinks that anyone who disagrees with one of the Amazing Xenophon’s predictions should be added as a defendant to Brett Kimberlin’s frivolous suit against Walker et al.

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Here’s a comment from the original post comparing the BU staff to the real Xenophon—

BTW, it’s interesting that Osborne never mentioned that I was misgendering him as “Xenophon.”

Time and Grammar

Time has published a piece about a woke artist and posted this tweet to promote the article.The tweet appears to have been written in English. If so, the wrong words have been used for third person pronouns.

Of course, Time‘s current ungoodthinkfull confusion about pronouns will be resolved as the company completes the transition to Newspeak.

The only classes of words that were still allowed to inflect irregularly were the pronouns, the relatives, the demonstrative adjectives, and the auxiliary verbs. All of these followed their ancient usage, except that WHOM had been scrapped as unnecessary, and the SHALL, SHOULD tenses had been dropped …

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

As I’ve previously noted, Team Kimberlin’s lack of respect for the intellectual property right of others has occasionally been costly for them. This post from eight years ago today In Re Animus Nocendi dealt with one of Bill Schmalfeldt’s misadventures.

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Animus Nocendi is the name of the Cabin Boy™ latest cut-and-paste opus. I haven’t read it yet, but Amazon says that I should have a copy tomorrow. I may give it a review in a few days.

Speaking of reviews … The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt™ is squawking about “false reviews” and warning that they are violations of law. The law he cites is 15 USC § 1125 which is part of the Lanham Act. It deals with trademark infringement, false labeling of country of origin, and false advertising. It will be interesting to see how far he gets trying to sue anyone over a bad review using that statute.

ACME LEGALI’m sure he is getting the very finest of advice from Acme Legal.

Meanwhile, the Gentle Reader may wish to stock up on popcornJujubesRaisinetsJunior MintsMilk Duds, or Red Twizzlers available via Amazon.

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Mmmmmm, popcorn.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

As this Prevarication Du Jour from eight years ago today shows, Team Kimberlin couldn’t even figure out how to use Google Translate to lie about someone.

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PBT201403121428ZAd Google Translate facilius est discere quam ad lingua actu. Quod ita non est, puerpinguis?

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While it’s been almost 60 years since I took Latin, I still have some use of it. The Cabin Boy™ OTOH once bragged about making a C- on an English As A Second Language test.

Fish. Barrel. Some ammunition required.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Now that Breitbart Unmasked has shuffled off this mortal coil, perhaps The Deadbeat Publisher Kimberlin will put some effort into cleaning up some of his other websites.

Consider empr dot media. While it occasionally gets a new story lifted from some other source, its teaser crawl at the top of the home page really needs to be updated.

Newsspeak and Newspeak

Has the CBC been made part of the Ministry of Truth?“Experts say.” Which experts? The lexicographers working on the next edition of the Newspeak dictionary?

It’s a beautiful thing, the destruction of words. Of course the great wastage is in the verbs and adjectives, but there are hundreds of nouns that can be got rid of as well. … Don’t you see that the whole aim of Newspeak is to narrow the range of thought? In the end we shall make thoughtcrime literally impossible, because there will be no words in which to express it.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

What might be a liar’s ultimate fear? Eight years ago today I considered what would be waiting for an editor of Breitbart Unmasked in Room 101?

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Xenophon the Troll’s use of the term “memory hole” in a post he put up at Breitbart Unmasked (No, I won’t link to it.) got me thinking about the origin of that term in the book Nineteen Eighty Four. One thought led to another, and Room 101 came to mind. Room 101 was the torture chamber at the Ministry of Love where the Party subjected a prisoner to his worst nightmare.

That got me to thinking … what would Xenophon find in Room 101?

Truth, perhaps?

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Truth has always been a stranger to Breitbart Unmasked.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Yesterday’s TKPOTD dealt with an example of Team Kimberlin’s tendency to keep using failed strategies. This Dead Horse Du Jour is the follow up post from five years ago today.

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The Cabin Boy™ wants to keep flogging his dead horse story of non-existent plagiarism.

Fine. I hope he keeps it up. It has several benefits.

First, his foolishness provides an opportunity for pointage, laughery, and mockification by those who enjoy it.

Second, his time and energy spent ranting about me is time and energy that won’t be spent cyberstalking toddlers or cyberharassing the employers of his perceived enemies.

Third, over the past year or so, Bill Schmalfeldt and Breitbart Unmasked Bunny Billy Boy Unread have lost what little credibility and what few readers they once had. At this point, nothing they write or say has any clout. While I intend to hold them to account for their earlier troublemaking, what they do online now (with the exception of continuing breaches of the 2014 Settlement Agreement) is not likely to be worth the trouble of addressing with anything other than derision.

Fourth, … oh, you get the picture, Gentle Reader.


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Losing losers gotta lose.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Of course, I’m not qualified to provide a formal diagnosis of any of the members of Team Kimberlin, but I will note that they often kept trying the same failing tactics over and over again as if they expected a different result. Five years ago today, I posted about a particular Dead Horse Du Jour.

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The Cabin Boy™ apparently doesn’t know The First Rule of Holes, i.e., when your in over your head, stop digging.fmp201701300030It’s been suggested to me that his continuing rant about plagiarism is a crackpot scheme aimed at creating a defense to the defamation claim in the lawsuit I’ve filed against him. The theory is that he’s trying to completely destroy his own credibility so that he can claim that since no one believes anything he says, his ravings can’t cause damage and, therefore, can’t be defamatory. I’m not sure I buy that. It’s too complicated even for one of the Cabin Boy’s™ harebrained schemes.

OTOH, it seems that even the Breitbart Unmasked Bunny Billy Boy Unread server doesn’t pay him any attention. Here’s where the link in his tweet goes—bu20170129

Do you have to make GS-14 in order to learn how to properly link to your own posts?

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Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Team Kimberlin fails at almost every thing they try because the often act with out thinking things through. The I’m Not Making This Up, You Know post from three years ago today presents a classic example.

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In a staggering bit of cluelessness, Breitbart Unmasked Bunny Billy Boy Brett Unread is writing about attempted serial bombings.As far as we know, none of the devices have used Mark Time timers or Tovex or have been contained in a gym bag. Still, …

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To borrow a phrase—the mockery continues.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

This Prevarication Du Jour dealt with one of the many false forecasts of the direst of dire direness looming ahead for the defendants on the first of Brett Kimberlin’s LOLsuits. It first ran eight years ago today.

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ftrrnews201310111937ZCutting my own deal am I? Well, Gentle Reader, I did offer Brett Kimberlin a cheap way out of his Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. lawsuit. He opted not to settle, so my lawyer has filed an answer to his complaint.

I have no intention of conducting my defense of the suit on the Internet, but items filed as part of the court docket become public documents unless they are sealed. Since anyone who goes to the courthouse can get a copy of a docket item for fifty cents per page and since the truth is on my side, I will, at least for the time being, post my filings to save folks the trip. I’ll delay the postings to allow time for any other party to receive service before anything appears online.

I do not plan to have any comments on filings when I post them. To do so could give away information on my counsel’s legal strategy which would be useful to the other side.

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He really should have taken my settlement offer.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

One of the Kimberlin not-for-profits was originally called Velvet Revolution US, but he changed its name in 2017 to Protect Our Elections/EMPR Inc. EMPR appears to stand for EuroMaidan PR which operates an English-language Ukrainian “news” site at empr dot media. The IRS has terminated the entities 501(c)4 tax exemption, and the corporation is not in good standing with the State of Maryland.

The TKPOTD from a year ago today showed how Brett Kimberlin was using EMPR to “protect” the 2020 election.

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Well, it looks as if Team Kimberlin has figured which one their active websites has the best following. The global popularity ratings of the English language Ukrainian news site empr dot media and itstime2020 dot org are 6,164,010 and 14,338,928 respectively. Yesterday evening, this opinion piece appeared on the EuroMaidan PR website.

I’m not making this up, you know.

Russia has a long history of using assassination to effect its geopolitical goals, especially around elections. Although there have been no specific public threats by Russia to assassinate any American, including Mr. Biden, security officials in the United States would be foolish and naïve not to consider this very real possibility based on Russia’s recent use of poisons and assassinations. Indeed, members of the Russian Duma and commentators on Kremlin state media outlets have stated recently that the only way Donald Trump can win is if something happens to Joe Biden.

The piece engages in speculation that the Russians might try to assassinate Biden as a way of insuring that Trump wins the election, implying that could be a reason for Biden’s Secret Service detail to be keeping him in the basement.

This may be the most outlandish of all of Kimberlin’s false narratives.

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Even the Congressional Democrats had moved on from the Russia Collusion Hoax by then.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

I’ll say one thing for Team Kimberlin—their general ineptitude has made it easy to make fun of them. This post from eight years ago today snickered at Bill Schmalfeldt’s silly claims to be ethically engaging in Peaceable Journalism.

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LG201302201107Znet_trollBill Schmalfeldt keeps going on about how what he has done and is doing is a “peaceable activity” and “journalism.” He ignores that the Circuit Court examined the evidence that he presented with the assistance of able counsel and found that he was engaging in harassment instead. That’s now a matter of legal fact that is not subject to being relitigated. Bill Schmalfeldt has been adjudicated as a harasser. Period.

The Cabin Boy isn’t a journalist. He’s a troll, and not a very good one at that.


(H/T, Good Stuff in The Other McCain‘s comment section for the Munchkin card)

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Like shooting fish in a barrel.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

11 September, 2013, fell on a Wednesday. On that day I post about why I Couldn’t Live in a Place That Small.

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SiteSuckerI had budgeted Tuesday of this week as a prep day for being in court today. I had planned to spend yesterday reviewing the claims that Cabin Boy Bill Schmalfeldt had been making in order to have cogent responses for questions that might come my way at the trail. Even though the charges were dropped, I poked around some of the posts he’s had up on his sites, including the defunct ones. They’ve been archived. SiteSucker is a neat tool.

I’m not a gulton for punishment. I’ve tried to spend as little time as possible mucking about Schmalfeldt’s ravings, so, yesterday, I found some surprisingly … what’s a good word? … stupid? … bizarre? … wacko? … yeah, wacko … some surprisingly wacko stuff in his posts about the Maryland v. Schmalfeldt cases.

We’ve dealt with his lame excuses for @mentions and his lies about nefarious characters tricking him into @replies. Enough of that, already.

Let’s look at how he has gone on about hashtags. One of the things I complained of in my first Application for Statement of Charges was that he was using hashtags on Twitter as a surrogate way of addressing me. Here are my exact words:

Additionally, Schmalfeldt attempted to contact me indirectly by including #wjjhoge within a series of addresses in other tweets. Use of # (called a “hashtag” on Twitter) causes the message to archived under the subject of the hashtag. #wjjhoge tags tweets to an archive associated with my name.

It is not the use of a hashtag per se but Schmalfeldt’s particular and peculiar use a hashtag in a line of addresses that is the basis of my complaint. Now, see how the Cabin Boy twists that. In his A Picture is Worth 260 Blog Posts rant that he put up at 8:32 Monday evening on fighttherightradio dot com (now taken down), he wrote about

hashtag mentions of #BillSchmalfeldt, which Mr. Hoge SWORE UNDER PENALTY OF PERJURY he believes are a backdoor way of attempting to contact me.

Huh? Once again, I have never claimed that the simple use of a hashtag on Twitter should be considered an attempt to contact the person who is the subject of the hashtag. What I asserted was that including a hashtag within a list of addresses was an attempt by the Cabin Boy to find a work around for his fixation with @mentions so that he could contact me without violating what he imagined the terms of the peace order to be. He sent tweets like this one, for example:

RadioWMS @cgable63 <– @AaronWorthing #wjjhoge @Kimberlinunmask @Patterico @rsmccain @Stranahan would he do that?// I am the father of your children.
7:07 PM – 6 Jul 13

That’s a subtle, but quit different, use of the hashtag compared to this, a more usual use—BSandChildPornFor the record, Schmalfeldt did eventually denounce child porn.

Do you see what he’s done? He lied about what I wrote and used that lie to try to hold me to a rule I never endorsed. He used a #wjjhoge hashtag in a odd way a dozen or so times, and I complained about it. That does not provide any justification for his absurd claims about my completely normal use of #BillSchmalfeldt.

And in any case, so what? Since I’ve never engaged in any harassment, I have no restrictions on my speech. The Cabin Boy has been adjudicated as a harasser.

We’ll take a look at some more of his wacko claims in a later post. I’ve had enough for now.

Stay tuned.

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My podcasting partner Stacy McCain has used the expression a few fries short of a Happy Meal to describe the Cabin Boy™, but that doesn’t really work as a physical description, does it?

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Team Kimberlin is a bunch of liars, and if the story cited in the TKPOTD from seven years ago is to be believed, they even lie to each other.

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My copy of Animus Nocendi, Bill Schmalfeldt’s latest cut-and-paste opus, arrived Thursday afternoon. I’ve read it. It uses some of his old blog posts and various court papers stitched together with a bit of connective text to attempt to tell his side of “the story.” I can’t really recommend it as an accurate, nothing-but-the-truth, recounting of the interactions between him and me over the past couple of years.

He does share one interesting anecdote. At the very beginning of the book, he relates a conversation he had with Brett Kimberlin in which the subject of Kimberlin’s claim of being Dan Quayle’s dope dealer came up. He quotes Kimberlin as saying, “Of all the things I’ve been charged with, that’s the one thing I DID do!” That summarizes the factually challenged nature of the book. Brett Kimberlin was never charged with selling marijuana (or any other drug) to Dan Quayle, and, if Mark Singer’s research for Citizen K, Kimberlin’s authorized biography, is to be believed, he never sold Dan Quayle any dope either. Similarly, many of the events discussed in the book did not actually transpire as Schmalfeldt describes them.

As I said, I can’t recommend Animus Nocendi. Howerver, if you insist on buying a copy, may I suggest that you use the Amazon shopping link on the Home page? I’ll get a cut of the action, and any earnings from sales of the book will be sent to Bomber Sues Blogger. [expired link] to help with the expense of defending against The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s vexatious lawsuit aimed at suppressing the First Amendment rights of bloggers.

One more thing … animus nocendi is Latin for “intending to harm.” That appears to be an accurate description of the purpose of the book.

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Animus Nocendi is a print on demand book. It really can be ordered from Amazon.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

For all their grandiose planning and “clever” narratives, Team Kimberlin fails because they never seem to be able to understand the likely consequences of their actions of implication of what they’re saying. This I’m Not Making This Up, You Know from seven years ago today pointed out an unforced error.

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Bunny Boy has a headline story over at Breitbart Unmasked about a young criminal being caught with IEDs. (No, I won’t link to it.)

Apparently, Brett Kimberlin was unavailable for comment.

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Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

The LOLsuits filed by Team Kimberlin have been a pain in the neck (or a couple of feet lower), but the amazing errors they’ve contain have also been a rich source of pointage, laughery, and mockification. This post from seven years ago today, Well, Either One’s a Genius, was about one such error.

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Oliver Wendell Who?oliver_wendellOliver Wendell SchmalfeldtUPDATE—There’s a brief bio of Jones here.

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Words Have Meaning

And Sarah Hoyt has a post over at According to Hoyt about how collectivist/progressives/liberals have created a style sheet that bends public discourse in their favor.

Look, half of the way you think is bounded in by words. And half of the way other people think too. By using the leftist chosen terms, you’re lending them your unwitting support.

Don’t lose the war of words. Come up with more accurate terms, and think about what you’re saying.

Don’t let the Left frame the terms of the debate. Make them deal with the Real World on its terms. Or if it’s to your advantage, force them to stick with a contradictory position. (Hey, AP, why are you complaining about your Gaza office? Destruction of property isn’t violence again, is it?)

Don’t let the wokie win.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

The members of Team Kimberlin lie so much that I wound up publishing posts called Prevarication Du Jour. Some days even wound up with a Bonus Prevarication Du Jour. One appeared seven years ago today.

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Here’s the sort of nonsense that the Cabin Boy™ is tweeting on his protected Twitter account:PBT20140406Well, let’s see who’s lying.

Here is my answer to his petition for writ of certiorari. It does not even mention Parkinson’s Disease.

Perhaps he means my answer to his motion for reconsideration of the Court of Appeals denial of a stay of the peace order pending appeal. Here are his motion and my answer. In his paragraph 8 he alleges that his Parkinson’s Disease makes travel to Westminster impractical. My answer denies that based on evidence of scheduling arrangements he had already made. I didn’t deny that he had Parkinson’s Disease, I denied the level of incapacitation he claimed—based on evidence.


UPDATE—I denied that the Cabin Boy™ was so incapacitated that it was impractical for him to appear in court for a hearing on his own motion to amend the peace order, and, behold, he appeared in court on 16 October at the hearing. That tends to confirm my analysis.

UPDATE 2—I’m informed that Schmalfeldt has a laundry list of questions I “must” answer over at Patriot-Ombudsman.


He just doesn’t understand that he has no standing as the Grand Inquisitor of the Interwebz, and that no one owes him any answers about anything.

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Given that the Cabin Boy™ claims to be a genuine GS-13 editor with actual Navy PR flack training (JO rating), he must have missed the day they covered fact checking.