This episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign first ran six years ago today.

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ANNOUNCER: From Westminster, it’s time for—

SOUND: Cell phone rings once.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) Hey, Johnny, are keeping your head above water?

JOHNNY: (Chuckles) Yeah. It’s not that hard. I’m back home.

[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) Did you find what we were looking for?

JOHNNY: That and more. This is going to open up several intriguing avenues for follow up.

MUSIC: Theme up and under.

ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …

JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

MUSIC: Theme up to music out.

JOHNNY: The following is partial extract of the tweets sent and received during the Eyes Upon You Matter.

JOHNNY TWEETS: (SYNTH VOICE) @[redacted] Deep Vote was right about following the money.

JOHNNY: It’s good to be back home. I’ve been traveling for the past few weeks following leads. Those travels have taken me to some interesting places. I wound up coming back from overseas through Houston.

SOUND: Airport background.

ICE AGENT: Welcome back, Mr. … um .. Atsign. Do you have anything to declare?

JOHNNY: No. It was just a quick business trip.

ICE AGENT: With lots of interesting stops according to these visa. Hmmm. OK. Everything looks in order. Here’s your passport. Next.

SOUND: Airport background out.

JOHNNY: It was an easy connection from Houston to Austin where I was able to do some research looking into records on file with the Texas Secretary of State. That led to [redacted].

[redacted]

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[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) (Fading up) … so you were able to make a connection to the nine thousand?

JOHNNY: Yeah, on both ends.

[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) So it looks like the information that [redacted] is true.

JOHNNY: That’s not ironclad, but it’s the way I’d bet, at least for now.

[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) What do you think [redacted] will do?

JOHNNY: I’m just a lowly internet investigator. I’ll the big shots decide. But maybe I’ll buy some popcorn futures.

[redacted]: And you think the other piece ties in too?

JOHNNY: Probably.

[redacted]: (Telephone Filter) OK. Send me your report, and I’ll pass it along.

JOHNNY TWEETS: @TheGrouch You really should have checked further.

ANNOUNCER: Now, here’s our star to tell you about next week’s intriguing episode of our story.

JOHNNY: Next week? Is someone doomed to repeat history? Join us, won’t you.

Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

MUSIC: Swell theme and under

ANNOUNCER: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign, starring W. J. J. Hoge, is transcribed in Westminster. Be sure to join us next Monday, same time and URL, for the next exciting episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign.

MUSIC: Theme up to music out.

ANNOUNCER: Johnny Atsign is a work of fiction. If anyone thinks it’s about him, he should read Proverbs 28:1.

This is LBS, the Lickspittle Broadcasting System.

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Yes, in some cases a history of repetitive failure.