Team Kimberlin lost all of their LOLsuits through complete and utter incompetence. Indeed, only one of the cases made it to trial, and Brett Kimberlin asked questions that helped the defendants show that he had no case. This exchange with Aaron Walker was one of my favorites.

MR. KIMBERLIN: Okay, now when you call me a pedophile repeatedly —

MR. WALKER: Uh-huh.

MR. KIMBERLIN: You must have some basis for that. Tell me what you tell the jury why you know, why you think that’s true? And where is the truth, where is the evidence?

MR. WLAKER: Okay, well it’s a number of different things. First of all I read Mark Singer’s book on Citizen K, the authorized —

MR. KIMBERLIN: Your Honor, first of all —

THE COURT: It’s your question.

MR. KIMBERLIN: I understand.

THE COURT: You asked the question.

MR. KIMBERLIN: I understand.

Go ahead.

MR. WALKER: And in that book it discusses how you had a very questionable relationship with a young girl. He identifies her as Jessica Barton. Her real name I have since learned is [redacted]. She was 10 years old when you came into her life according to Singer. And it also, by the way, this is backed up by Indianapolis Star newspaper articles I’ve also read. She was 10 years old when she came into your life. She was 14 years old when you left it, I think I understand when you were arrested for the series of bombings you committed and you were convicted of.

I couldn’t have made that up no matter how hard I tried.