Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


In the beginning of my writing about Brett Kimberlin, I jokingly referred to him as Lord Voldemort because his illegal gag order against Aaron Walker made him “he who must not be named,” at least by Aaron. I teasingly referred to Kimberlin’s followers and enablers as Death Eater Wannabes. Not long after that gag order was quashed, Kimberlin started pirate-themed fund-raising website, so I began calling him The Dread Pirate Kimberlin, and certain of his followers were made members of his crew. One of my readers started calling TDPK’s main PR flack Cabin Boy Bill Schmalfeldt, and that tag has stuck.

One of the reasons that Team Kimberlin has failed at almost every enterprise they’ve undertaken is the members inability to understand their lack of competence. Six years ago today, I ran this post called #BillSchmalfeldt: Delusions of Adequacy.

* * * * *

Let’s back up for a minute and reexamine that Cabin Boy quote from 18 February.

It’s all horseshit. It’s all absolute horseshit. And I and my family have been put through pain and suffering because Lee Stranahan has a grudge. Because somebody, in my opinion, is paying Lee Stranahan to file these charges against me, in the hopes that I will either break or die.  I got some fucking news for you, Stranny [pause] Walker, Hoggy, Frey [pause] and Frey [pause] beware the Ides of March.

Somebody paid Lee Stranahan to file charges? Oh, come now. Who would care enough about a loser like Bill Schmalfeldt to want to spend the money?

Bill Schmalfeldt is a failure. Other than people who are dealing with his harassment and a few others who enjoy laughing at his gaffes, almost no one cares about him and the ways he blights the Internet. He’s a functional nonentity with a vanishingly small readership and essentially nonexistent listenership.

He is, at most, a vile insect, and some of us who he has annoyed have taken swats at him, but no one had to pay us. Certainly, the filthiness the Stranahan family endured from the Cabin Boy was sufficient motivation for Lee Stranahan to seek redress, and it’s not surprising that the Walker family sought relief either.

I have been able to bring a bit of justice to Schmalfeldt via a peace order. No one paid me to do so. I brought legal action because I was tired of being harassed. I’ve paid every cent of the my legal expenses out of my own pocket. Sore Loserman Bill has filed a Motion to Modify the peace order. I won’t speak to the merits (if there are any) of his motion while it is before the court, that’s my lawyer’s job, but I will say that it strikes me as foolish attempt to relitigate the case. The judge ruled on the facts and the law and issued the peace order. Schmalfeldt is also appealing the case. It will be interesting to see if the appeals court gets to the case before the peace order expires and makes his appeal moot. Meanwhile, the Cabin Boy continues to misrepresent the terms of the peace order in a lame effort to justify his ongoing violations.

Although some of his associates are troubling, I’m not afraid of Bill Schmalfeldt per se. I’m annoyed by him. I intend to use all lawful means to make sure that he stops bothering me. If that shuts him down so that he can’t bother anyone else, it will be a nice bonus.

No one hopes that Bill Schmalfeldt will “break or die.” He not that important to anyone. His victims just wish the grossly inadequate loser would quit wasting Internet bandwidth and leave decent people alone. As Mr. T says,

I pity the fool.

* * * * *

I have to say that my view of the Cabin Boy™ has changed over the years. Whatever pity I had has been dissipated.

And I’m not done with him yet.

2 thoughts on “Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

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