Blogsmoke


Sometimes the Real World will just not let go. My day job has kept me busier than a one-armed paperhanger, so there isn’t a fresh BLOGSMOKE script for this evening. Here’s a vintage episode from Many, 2015.

BlogsmokeSOUND: MODEM CONNECTING FADES UP TO FULL MIKE—SINGLE SHOT—RICHOCHET

MUSIC: UP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 1

ANNOUNCER: (VOICE OVER MUSIC) Around Twitter Town and in the territory of the net—there’s just one way to handle the harassers and the stalkers—and that’s with an Internet Sheriff and the smell of “BLOGSMOKE”!

MUSIC: THEME HITS: FULL BROAD SWEEP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 2

ANNOUNCER: “BLOGSMOKE” starring W. J. J. Hoge. The story of the trolling that moved into the young Internet—and the story of a man who moved against it. (MUSIC: OUT)

JOHN: I’m that man, John Hoge, Internet Sheriff—the first man they look for and the last they want to meet. It’s a chancy job—and it makes a man watchful … and a little lonely.

MUSIC: MAIN TITLE—RECORDED—CUT 3

JOHN: The Grouch had been looking for some way to tag me with something, anything that would cause me legal problems. He didn’t seem to care if it were civil or criminal, just as long as he cou …

ANNOUNCER: We interrupt Blogsmoke to bring you this news bulletin.

This morning W. J. J. Hoge filed the following Informal Response Brief in the Kimberlin v. National Bloggers Club, et al. appeal with the Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals in Richmond.

ANNOUNCER: We return you now to “BLOGSMOKE” already in progress.

… not necessarily our jurisdiction. It depends on which State’s Attorney does what or whether everything is consolidated by the Attorney General. If Maryland cleans up the mess, we won’t have to get involved.

JOHN: OK. I’ll pass that along.

MUSIC: CLOSING TITLE UP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 6

ANNOUNCER: (VOICE OVER MUSIC) Even with a good imagination, we can’t come up with stories as strange as The Grouch and his buddies provide for episodes of “BLOGSMOKE”!

MUSIC: SWELL AND CONTINUE TO MUSIC OUT

ANNOUNCER: The Legal Department wishes the following declaimer read: “‘BLOGSMOKE’ is a work of fiction. Anyone who feels it might be about him should read Proverbs 28:1.”

Be sure to tune in on Monday at 6 pm Eastern Time for the next intriguing episode of “Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign,” and join us again every Friday at 6 for alternating episodes “BLOGSMOKE” and “Blognet.”

This is LBS, the Lickspittle Broadcasting System.

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