Since Brett Kimberlin unwisely took on Aaron Walker in 2012, every Team Kimberlin LOLsuit has ended in failure. Only one LOLsuit made it to trial after having most of its claims thrown out on summary judgment, and the trail was stopped before we defendants put on our case because The
Dread Deadbeat Pro-Se Kimberlin failed to offer any evidence to support his claims that we had defamed him or invaded his privacy. All TDPK’s peace order petitions similarly failed. None of Bill Schmalfeldt’s LOLsuits have survived motions to dismiss. The peace order petition he filed against Patrick Grady failed because The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt failed to face Mr. Grady in court.
One common feature of most of these LOLsuits has been making claims that aren’t supported by a lawful cause of action. I wrote about that in the TKPOTD from two years ago today.
* * * * *
A recurring theme in many of the Team Kimberlin LOLsuits is the inclusion of claims for nonexistent torts. For example, two of the claims in the Kimberlin v. Walker, et al. nuisance lawsuit were thrown out at summary judgment because they weren’t based on any recognized cause of action. In that case, The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin tried to my codefendants and me for stalking and harassment, but while they are crimes, they are not torts. In the RICO Remnant LOLsuit, he’s trying to sue for conspiracy, and, as Judge Mason told him, that’s not a stand-alone tort either.
The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt has followed in his excellent friend’s footsteps. When he filed LOLsuit I: The Emotional Picture, he included a claim for harassment. In LOLsuit IV: The Voyage to Oblivion, the Cabin Boy™ tried to sue for both harassment and conspiracy. In LOLsuit VI: The Undiscovered Krendler, … well, we’ll see.
* * * * *
The Cabin Boy™ included claims in LOLsuit VIII: Avoiding Contact for which there were no causes of action and wound up having to withdraw them in his amended complaint, and that amend complaint was dismissed because, just like LOLsuits III, IV, and VI, he sued in courts not having personal jurisdiction over the defendants.
And butthurt is still not a tort.