Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

The U. S. District Court for the District of South Carolina has ordered that the Cabin Boy™ finish filling out some of the necessary paperwork for LOLsuit VIII: Avoiding Contact.

According to the case management officer at the court, this does not mean that the case is approved to go forward. A go/no-go decision will be taken after all the paperwork is in place.

Meanwhile, the court has told the Cabin Boy™ to knock off sending emails to the District Judge and the Magistrate Judge assigned to the case.

Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen.

Oh, one more thing … During the past week I was taking note of the days remain until yesterday. The defendants may have thought that referred to yesterday’s pretrial conference in the Hoge v. Kimberlin, et al. lawsuit. It didn’t. Something was due yesterday. It may have arrived and been timestamped too late to show up on the docket until Monday. OTOH, someone may have forgotten to file it. We shall see.

Meanwhile, it’s now T-minus 2 days and counting.

83 thoughts on “Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

  1. If my memory serves me right this is not the first time he has been told not to send emails to a judge or court clerk.

  2. Dear Judge,

    I wanna sue someone. Let me know when you’ve taken care of all this stuff.

    William Smellfart, Twitter Attorney at Law

  3. “It may have arrived and been timestamped too late to show up on the docket until Monday. OTOH, someone may have forgotten to file it.”

    I know which one my money is on…

  4. Oliver Wendell Jones is being a pain in the Court’s ass already? That can’t be the William Schmaleldt I know!

  5. Meanwhile, the court has told the Cabin Boy™ to knock off send emails to the District Judge and the Magistrate Judge assigned to the case.

    But just emails from him, right? Twitter, Facebook, and forwarded emails from new accounts which are totally not him weren’t mentioned and are still good?

    • Gee, I hope none of the defendants have moved since the last LULsuit was filed.

      seeing how Bwilly has already sent out the summonses and all.

      his having to redo some of them due to incorrect addressing would be TRAGIC wouldn’t it?

      but then Dumbf5cks gotta Dumbf5ck don’t they?

  6. Anyone else notice “subject to the court’s right to require a payment if Plaintiff’s financial condition changes, and to tax fees and costs against Plaintiff at the conclusion of this case if the COURT FINDS THE CASE TO BE WITHOUT MERIT”

    LOL, he is so screwed.

    • In the most entertaining of ways,

      First, he’ll have nutshuffled through flophouses in Arkansas, Alaska, California, Costa Rica and Venus by the time that happens. South Carolina is a DUMBFUCK’s third state of residence Hoge v. Kimberlin et al was filed just fifteen months ago because he’s the world’s most nomadic pauper.

      Second, his record for keeping courts appraised of his address is pretty legendary.

      Third, I already have a “Dear Mommy” mentally mapped out for when the Yokohama Casanova complains to the South Carolina court that Hoge won in Maryland because he’s a big meanie and a cheater.

      • His chief accomplishment in filing this suit has been to pin himself down so it is more difficult for him to run from the other suit.

        • What makes you think he won’t skedaddle again? And fail to inform the court, again?

          That was just a form letter. All pro se plaintiffs get it, so it doesn’t apply to Bill.

          • Indeed, it makes me wonder if this is how things went down:

            K: I need my patsy to act up again. People are starting to think I’m the world’s worst pro se again.
            R: I’ll get him to move to SC using this blowup doll as a boyfriend for him, and you give him these instructions to file the same old lawsuit again.
            K: What are those instructions?
            R: It’s the form letter of what *NOT* to do when filing an SC lawsuit, but I changed all the “do not”s in it to just say “do.”
            K: Brilliant!

  7. Do the defendants do requests? If so, could the Florence Five Four challenge IFP through to its comical conclusion before filing the fatal Motion to Dismiss?

    In a completely predictable move, Drunkenstein’s demonstrated impulse control issues and magic elixir have made it so that he’ll be answering motions at the exact same time that he’s defending himself in Maryland. Given the timeline in Lulzsuit VIII, I expect that the IFP challenge will be landing at the flophouse door just as his ordeal in Westminster begins. That’s five wasted days right there.

    I know that it’s selfish, but I want the lulz on this one drawn out for as long as possible.

    • But he only needs an hour a half bottle of JWR to write his opposition to the IFP challenge.

    • If DUMBF*CK lands in a Maryland jail does he have to notify the District Court of SC of a change of address?

    • I’m curious of the whole “will have to pay costs if case is without merit” will extend to the part where oppositions start noting all the overlap to a case dismissed with prejudice.
      IANAL so I’m not sure if that covers “without merit” or not. (In common language it would.)

  8. What I love is that in one case he’s doing his best to be imprisoned, while in another he’s been told he MUST keep the court up to date with his address.


    • I sent one email… and received a letter telling me what I did was improper and that I must not do it again.

      But totally not told to “knock it off”. Nope. Never happened.

      Only man he has to blame for his reputation is himself.

    • You know, GS-13 editors are supposed to have good reading comprehension skills as part of their job. This kind of shit makes me wonder how Dumbfuck made it all the way to GS-13 in the first place.

      My theory is that in government, as is the same in Hollywood, you fail upward.

      • My theory is he was hired because he was a “veteran” and a loud-mouthed lefty, kept around because it’s too hard to fire a slacker in civil service, and finally granted “disability” because it gave a way to get rid of him.

      • My theory is that in government, as is the same in Hollywood, you fail upward.

        You don’t want to ruin someone’s career, so you promote them to a point where you no longer have a slot for their grade in your office… so they become someone else’s problem.

        At least, I saw a couple of examples of that in the Army… don’t know if GS works the same way.

  9. The fourth circuit is known as the most efficient appellate court in the nation. Seems like the moniker extends to it’s districts too judging from this order.

    The fourth circuit won’t suffer fools gladly.

    I can’t believe the moron was emailing the judge. Only an idiot would do such a thing. Heck, I bet even 5 year old with parents watching Judge Judy know you shouldn’t annoy a judge. Then again Bill did lose to a toddler once.

  10. So BIll has been given a list of deficiencies, and a clear deadline.

    This could be amusing.

  11. How refreshing! A court cites and enforces rules and tells William “I stole.valor and fake Parkinson’s” Shmalfeldt ahead of time that they’re going to be enforced! Its almost as if its not in Maryland.

    Oh wait…

  12. I can’t wait to hear the whining and to see the Fear Pee flow from Sir Shit Stain when he finds out that the games and flagrant violation of the Rules he has played in Maryland Court won’t fly in Federal Court.

    When that happens, I bet the Zombie John Denver Blow Up Doll finally leaves him.

  13. there are some out there, those, attracted to red clown haired men with mysterious blotchy faces, who think that their money and property are exempt from a legal judgement.

    Garnishments are rarely done. bank accounts can be frozen periodically to examine whether non retirement funds are co mingled. (Fat smelly cheese crusted blobs in some random hotel room of the week club notwithstanding)

    money, property, even rents, deposits, all electronics, cable payments internet payments, Also using the pension shield laws to deliberately commit acts of harassment, ignoring lawful debts has under various state laws becomes unlawful conduct.

    So no tv, internet, cars, computers, stereos, radios, cell phones for the rest of your life if someone is stupid enough to first not settle, then use the sec207 shield (which states are piercing with case law daily) to avoid a lawful debt.


    • Certain court ordered payments are not subject to state exemption laws and are not discharged in bankruptcy . ….

      • Are you there God? It’s me, Neal.

        I know we haven’t talked in a really long time, but I need to see Bill Schmaleldt try to navigate, interpret and apply the American bankruptcy laws by himself. I promise to spread your good word forever if you can make him do it sober.



    • As I read that letter, the court is saying it wants the forms for the summons so that it will all be ready to go if they approve the case. The implication is that they haven’t approved it yet, or at least not as of when that letter was written.

  14. There has been an extended stay rise in methane emissions in SC


    Replying to @AnonIsExtinct and @JustSikko
    The science is right there in the fact that the earth has been warmer every year since we hit the tipping point five years ago.

    • What a DUMBF5CK! As of 2014 – only 3 years ago – there had been no global warming since 1998. That’s 16 years of nothing changing, and nothing has changed since then. Here’s the article that reports this and gets you behind the paywall at the WSJ: WHATEVER HAPPENED TO GLOBAL WARMING? (safe link)

      “I search out the truth, wherever it may be.”

    • If we hit the tipping point five years ago then why all the urgency now? Isn’t it kinda late already, by that measure?

  15. What a complete clustermuck. Bill would do well to stop emulating his hero/criminal, settle with Hoge as best he can, and live a more peaceful and productive life.

  16. Being approved for IFP isn’t something one normally crows about to the entire world. How sad a life…

    OK, now that’s out of the way, the Schmalruss is gonna have fun paying the taxes and fees sooner rather than later.

  17. I’d say “He’s going to fuck it up” but I’d be stating the obvious.

  18. Bill’s resume – Retired from the military with a disability; investigative journalist for 30 years; MULTIPLE jobs in radio (until he got tossed).

    All that adds up to is only enough possessions to be able to carry in a beat up SUV, and that he no longer owns.

    Yeah, his life has been a real winner all right.

  19. I see the bestest buds of the Pedo terrorist have struck again. Bill must be so proud of his defense of a bomber and terrorist sympathizer.

  20. Blood on the Mike @bloodonthemike
    “@wjjhoge The IFP is approved. The signed summons have been mailed. @wjjhoge can sit and relax and wait for service. He didn’t have to. His choice.”

    I see his GS-13 Editor reading skills are failing him again.

    “This case is not in proper form for service at this time.”
    “No process shall issue until the items specified above have been reviewed by the assigned Magistrate Judge.”
    “If, however, Plaintiff provides this court with the items specified above, the Clerk of Court should forward the file to the assigned Magistrate Judge to determine if service of process should be authorized.”

    Just because he filed the rest of the forms, and the IFP has been approved does not mean that the Magistrate Judge has determined that process has been authorized.

    • For Blab’s entire life whatever he has turned in has been accepted and treated as complete and compliant, even in Maryland. First because he is pro se but mostly because his nearly infinite limitations and self-inflicted liabilities make him an object of pity. They let the Loathsome Loser move forward knowing he will inevitably make an egregious mistake that allows them an excuse to kick him to the curb.

      Res Judicia will torpedo this latest misbegotten mess with the first round of responses even if the suit is approved.

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