One of the reasons the Cabin Boy™ has lost every LOLsuit he’s filed and almost every motion he’s filed in any suits he’s been involved in is that he doesn’t follow directions. If a rule says to do A, he will do Q. If a judge tells him to do X, he will do X+Y or, maybe, Z. For example, the last paragraph of this order tells the Cabin Boy™ what Judge Hecker has ordered him to do, …
… and here’s what Schmalfeldt says he was planning to do.
As the Gentle Reader can see, that isn’t what the judge ordered.
T-minus 3 days and counting.
Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen.
Oh, one more thing … It was warm in Myrtle Beach yesterday, and the Post Office is only about 0.8 mi from the Cabin Boy’s™ new lair. It would have been a nice day for a ride on Scooty-Puff. Does anyone know what happened to Scooty-Puff? Or Boris? Or Jake?