Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Today is The Dreadful Pro-Se Freeloader Schmalfeldt’s big day when he gets to meet with his freebie lawyer that the court has assigned to help him with his LOLsuit VII: Degenerations. That unfortunate lawyer has his work cut out for him. If the case is going to go forward, he’ll have to draft an amended complaint that actually alleges the elements of least one tort and that has admissible evidence to back up its allegations. There’s nothing like that in TDFS’s current complaint.

I haven’t got time to dissect his entire complaint, so I’ll just use his defamation claims as an example. He cites two quotes, one from Paul Krendler and one from Sarah Palmer to show how he was supposedly defamed. The quote from Sarah Palmer is a pure expression of personal opinion which clearly protected speech under the First Amendment—the inapposite bit of case law the Cabin Boy™ cites does not change that.

The Krendler quote is taken out of context, and the reference cited at The Thinking Man’s Zombie is false. I did manage to find the quote on a different website. The words quoted in the complaint are preceded by these—

Oh, and just an aside…by the above I do not mean to suggest in any way that

which means that the words TDFS claims are defamatory are not words that Krendler offers as being true.

I think it would be highly unlikely that any lawyer would be willing to risk Rule 11 sanctions by allowing a client to make such a false allegation.

The Cabin Boy™ should have an informative day today.

70 thoughts on “Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


  1. What are options and odds for those of us who would like to gamble on the Cabin Boy’s reactions apres’ meeting? Will he report truthfully on the meeting with his welfare lawyer? Will he express his disappointment when his attorney explains his real “situation” that butthurt is not a tort? Or will he lie through his teeth like usual?

    I have a very hard time believing a Chicago attorney will take on a pro bono case of such questionable circumstances and no possibility of a large cash payout. The most (if any) damages he could be awarded would most likely be under his hourly billing rate.


    • All lawyers are required to serve at least 50 hours pro bono every year to maintain good standing with the bar. So when the court assigned the Dumbfuck to the lawyer, it wasn’t out of the goodness of his heart.


      • That isn’t true. I think a few jurisdictions have tried that, but most worry that it’ll be struck down under the 13th A


        • So the State of Illinois, and by extension Patrick Grady, is paying for a Wisconsin resident to sue Patrick Grady of Illinois.
          Nice racket.


          • So, the Feds, and by extension all taxpayers are footing the bill?

            Aw, man; that just bummed my day.


          • Oh, look. Mr Hoge said it has nothing to do with State Court but rather Federal Court and around noonish, he got a down twinkle. I wonder if the world’s fattest Pedoketeer just found out what that means and is mad with the world now.


    • Embrace the power of and. I’m sure that Mr Sorich will explain how hopelessly deficit Bill Schmalfeldt’s complaint is even after Schmalfeldt lies through his teeth.


  2. Wait a minute! You’re telling me that he’s left his apartment and the safety of his alert button? I thought just a month or so ago he was telling everyone he didn’t dare go anyplace it didn’t work. John’s case just had to be transferred to Wisconsin, or better yet dropped, because expecting Bill to go someplace where his panic button didn’t work was exactly the same as trying to kill him.

    I guess he wants the world to believe that travelling overnight for something he wants to do, to seek revenge on all the people he’s attacked over the years who have refused to roll over, is completely different, and he doesn’t really need that button 24/7 if he’s having fun.


      • I’ve mentioned before that I had a legal dispute a number of years ago with my ex-business partner. At my first meeting with my attorney, he specifically said that I shouldn’t mention I’d retained him. The first time he knew I’d hired one was when I filed the lawsuit.

        Social media wasn’t really a thing then, but it never occurred to me to start a blog and start talking publicly about this.


        • I’ll just bet you also don’t post photos of yourself on the toilet, or of your wife in her bra, either. Anyone want to guess who has done that?


          • He probably didn’t live-blog himself pulling a turd out of the water, commenting on the color, rolling it and sniffing it before flushing it down the drain.

            I still maintain that that was the very, very last vestige of his soul.


  3. It will be an interesting day, and probably not in the way that the loathsome loser is hoping it will be. When he starts trying to get his welfare lawyer to start adding people and file more lawsuits for him I’m sure he isn’t going to like the answers he gets. I almost feel sorry for FiFi “I’d bang a 14 year old” Ferguson and Matt “The child porn wasn’t that bad” Osborne since they will probably be getting raging messages from him all night.


  4. Wait Wait WAIT!!!.. Didn’t he already post that his lawyers said not for him to worry about the spoliation? And now he writes that he was worried and called him about it?


    • I am prepared to deal with whatever decisions are made knowing that they’ll be made by competent legal Authority. If I have a case then it will be litigated. If I do not have a case I will rest comfortably knowing I’ve done everything I can do to hold these thugs responsible for their actions.

      That is some HIGH QUALITY backpedalling! What happened to owning peoples houses, cars, wives? Hmmmm…..


  5. His lawyer has my sympathies.

    BS? Meh. I should be able to muster my usual cringe on his behalf, but this particular injury is exactly what I have been warning him about for ages: picking up a rock, only to drop it on his own foot.

    Phone train.


    • If anyone from a law firm is wondering why Dianna always ends her posts with her location and the device that she’s using, it’s because earlier this year, Bill Schmalfeldt sued her and HER EMPLOYER, claiming that she was committing torts against him on company time, using company computers. Never mind considerable law holding that an employer is not liable for such alleged acts, he did it anyway. I wonder why someone would try to put the person they’re suing in the doghouse with their boss. Hmm, it’s a puzzler. Oh, at any rate, BS sua sponte dismissed them with prejudice.


  6. Welcome, Mr Schmalfeldt (retch). Before you get started providing me with your documents, is it true that you have deleted internet posts and comments after retaining my firm? Why on the Lord’s green Earth would you think it’s acceptable to do that? Is it true that you had a skit where a Scout Leader had anal sex with a Cub Scout? What made you think that wasn’t pornographic or illegal? Is it true that you took photographs of your wife on her deathbed and then posted them on the internet to jerk the chains of your online enemies while your wife was still alive? What actual human does that? Is it true that you told people you would leave them alone if they left the Speedway Bomber alone? Lawyers, politicians and accountants have a low public worth, and yet you have managed to create an even lower public valuation for yourself, and you don’t see how it was you who caused this? You do realize you have made it impossible for me to represent you and maintain the minimum required ethical standards to maintain my Bar license?


  7. Do you lickspittles understand that because of all of you, I have to check several websites several times a day…. I am ROTFLMAO. Thanks. And Bill F.U. On a boat in the middle of a lake,on my phone, enjoying what this summer has to offer.

  8. Pingback: Better Off Without a Lawyer | Dave Alexander & Company with David Edgren and Gus Bailey – The Artisan Craft Blog

Leave a Reply