I’m Not Making This Up, You Know

The Cabin Boy™ has filed a supplement to his motion to have the defendants’ lawyer disqualified in his LOLsuit VI: The Undiscovered Krendler.

It seems that the Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt’s muse for this bit of legal tomfoolery was Tom Lehrer’s song Lobachevsky. Paragraph 15 (which begins, “Thornwood v. Jenner & Block, 344 N.E.2d 15 (Ill.App. 2003) provides a classic example of an in-concert liability claim against a lawyer …”) is lifted word-for-word from the eighth paragraph in a copyrighted article by Daniel E. Tranen, The Risks Lawyers Face from Aiding and Abetting and Civil Conspiracy Claims, which was published online. The fact that this ripped off quote doesn’t deal with any of the issues raised in his motion doesn’t change the fact that the Cabin Boy has clearly plagiarized Mr. Tranen’s work (and probably engaged in what he likes to call “copyright theft” as well).

He’s also filed a motion for summary judgment, and it appears that he submitted the exhibits for the motion above as part of the summary judgment motion. The exhibits contain sealed material. I will publish them after I have had a chance to redact them.

All of this is a further demonstration that The Dreadful Pro-Se Schmalfeldt doesn’t understand how civil lawsuits proceed. I’ll leave it to the defendants’ lawyer and the judge to educate him.

The defendants’ have already submitted their responses to this round of BS’s BS, and I will be posting their filings shortly.

50 thoughts on “I’m Not Making This Up, You Know

  1. Weapons-grade stupid meets JW Red and we get this.

    Awesome in its stupidity. Can Aaron act on any of the smears contained, whilst he may not need a mobility scooter, he may know someone who does.

  2. This is all about not being sued the way he wants to sue, so now he’s pretending that he sets all of the agenda.

    His best hope is that the judge tosses this without reading more than a few paragraphs.

    Or he could say he was drunk. It would be believable.

    Yes, on my phone.

  3. WARNING: Stretch like you’ve never stretched before prior to attempting to read that pleading. Take breaks and stretch more. Let’s try to keep the lulz injuries to a minimum, horde.

    Unbelievable, even from the blob of stoooopid that is self-titled happy my wife died theMerryWidower.

    The fat freak informs the court that multiple courts in multiple states have adjudicated the loathsome loser a stalker and harasser, gives Aaron credit for these wins against the grotesque ghoul. And then claims it shows Aaron to be incompetent! hahahaha

  4. Using the schmalogic that led the fat freak to assert Aaron ‘endangered’ his former co-workers, the loathsome loser should be packing right now. After all, it claims the ‘hatred’ is “…endangering my life and that of everyone living or working in this apartment complex …”

    Of course, it can fit its entire estate in the back of a pick up, so it shouldn’t take long.

  5. “Defendants’ counsel has helped numerous victims of Plaintiff’s harassment, and is therefore unsuited to defend against his continuing harassment through lawfare.”

  6. There is no law in the US against audio kiddie porn? Wouldn’t the law against kiddie porn be relevant?

    “Judgiekins, all the voices on the kiddie porn are mine, so make me rich!”

    Really? Is it that easy? And he had no shame in admitting that it was kiddie porn while trying to steal money from someone who said it was kiddie porn?

    Wheels are spinning, gears are falling off, bolts, nuts, sprockets, springs, chains, flying everywhere. Wee Willy Widebody’s demented brain will never get put back together right.

    • Law or not, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to describe something pornographic and dealing with children as “kiddie porn.” Whether it’s legal or not doesn’t change that.

      After all, no one ever claimed BS had been convicted of dealing with child pornography, which seems to be the very standard BS is trying to go by.

  7. The more I think about this, the less likely I think the Big BM is going to get out of this one intact. The motion for summary judgement is so far beyond reasonable that the judge pretty much has to benchslap him. Hell, she hasn’t even decided whether to accept his amended complaint, /and/ granted the motion for extended time for the defendants to respond with a clock that starts ticking /after/ she’s decided which complaint is going to happen.

    And he has the gall to try for summary judgement.

    No, this won’t end well. He’s going to wind up pleading diminished capacity pro-se, and he’s still going to get whacked with a gavel.

  8. The motion to supplement is total crap. A turd of biblical proportions.
    The MSJ is ludicrous on its face.

  9. Holy Shit. There are not enough words do describe these…..these….masterpieces of stupidity. These pile of lies. You’d need a thesaurus FOR a thesaurus and even then you’d need to invent new words to describe these wretched abominations. Does Bill not understand that you can’t just declare things without proof? Is he really that stupid? Oh Bill, don’t ever change. You truly are a magnificent pile of stupid and you bring laughter at the end of a long week.

    World’s Stupidest Man™

    • I’m going to draw together all of William’s filings in all of his lovely lulzsuits, set them to music and call it the Ring Cycle of Stupid. The trick is to make properly Wagnerian, but not so much that the kids can’t dance to it.

          • He could shove a carrot up the Scooter of Vengance’s (it’s red! Vroom!) tailpipe in the final chase scene. Just as Bill is almost to the crest of a hill which will grant him victory. Scooty-Puff stops, and rolls backwards back down the hill. A loooooong hill. At the bottom is the local sewage treatment plant.

            Whadya mean it’s electric? IRL it is, but this is opera. What a maroon. Gas engines have better sound effects anyway.

            Side note, Aaron is a fricasseeing lawyer. Not a death threat.

      • Dumb is a familiar thing
        And I feel it’s poison sting
        Whiskey’s made me numb
        I fell into a hole of dumb

        I fell into a sinking pit of dumb
        I dug down, down, down, but I couldn’t overcome
        And it’s deep, deep, deep
        The hole of dumb, the hole of dumb

        The taste of law is sweet
        Before reality peeks
        I filed motion after motion,
        Oh, but I had no notion…

        I fell into a sinking pit of dumb
        I dug down, down, down, but I couldn’t overcome
        And it’s deep, deep, deep
        The hole of dumb, the hole of dumb

        And it’s deep, deep, deep
        The hole of dumb, the hole of dumb

  10. “redacted buy plaintiff”

    Is this a chain store selling discount whisky and scratch & dent lawsuits?

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