Bonus Legal LULZ Du Jour

Just as he was launching his current faildox this evening, the Cabin Boy™ tweeted this—dbr201512112213ZThere’re plenty of examples of the Cabin Boy™ making false statements to courts, both in oral testimony and in written filings. I’ll cite one of each.

During the District Court hearing for the first peace order petition on 28 February, 2013, Schmalfeldt stated that he had not received notice to stop contacting me. One of the reasons that the Circuit Court granted my petition on appeal was that my lawyer introduced documentation in the form to this tweet—oub201302151837Z—which demonstrated that the Cabin Boy™ was sufficiently aware of my notice to stop that he provided a link to it in his tweet sent several days before I filed for the peace order. Click on http://t.co/uZkIc4lA and see where it takes you. Go ahead. I’ll wait for you to come back.

Last 23 March, Schmalfeldt filed an opposition to my motion to dismiss his Schmalfeldt v. Hoge, et al. LOLsuit in the Howard County Circuit Court. This is on page 12—OP2MTD-p12I have never said that the Cabin Boy™ is faking having Parkinson’s disease or the extent to which he suffers from it. Here’s what I have said.

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Prevarication Du Jour

Originally Posted on 6 April, 2014

The Cabin Boy™ seems to be losing his grip on reality. He’s published the following over at Patriot-Ombudsman (No, I won’t link to it.)—P-O20140405I have never claimed that Bill Schmalfeldt is faking or exaggerating his Parkinson’s Disease. Indeed, I have suggested that he may be failing to recognized how profoundly it might be affecting him. Last October, I raised the possibility that he was experiencing the onset of Parkinson’s dementia. Just a couple of months ago, Schmalfeldt admitted to the onset of dementia in a letter to Judge Grimm when he tried to stick his nose into The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s RICO Madness. (Scroll down to the bottom of the second page.)

I believe that Bill Schmalfeldt has a serious medical condition. I’m not competent to diagnose it, but his symptoms seem consistent with Parkinson’s Disease with the onset of dementia. However, that does not provide any cover for his behavior. He began his acting out years ago and began harassing me over a year-and-a-half ago, so his present condition has no bearing on his culpability for his past actions.

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pantsonfireThe Cabin Boy™ is a liar, and among the places he routinely tells lies are courts of law. He is also a very bad liar who tells so many that he loses track of what he’s written and said.

I’ve only cited one example each of false testimony and false claims in written court papers, but there are many, many more fully documented and ready to use in court. If Schmalfeldt had a lick of sense, he’d realize that he’s painted himself into a corner and put an end to his silly threats of legal action. He doesn’t seem to have much sense, so I suppose he’ll have to be dealt with the hard way.

Murum aries attigit.

31 thoughts on “Bonus Legal LULZ Du Jour


  1. My eyebrows would be more raised by a claim that Bill only told the truth for 24 hours.

    Science fiction, I know.


  2. I am obviously not a medical professional so please pardon my ignorance. I was not aware, and am still somewhat uncertain, that being a horse’s ass was a treatable medical condition. So is it true that Witless Willie is in need of the appropriate medical services for being an equine fundament?


    • It’s weird that William makes such a big deal about his medical condition. After all, it’s not like he’s mentioned receiving any treatment for it since before he moved. In fact, I believe that going off of his goofy pills has more than a little to do with his recent tantrums.

      Of course, that shouldn’t suggest that I’m in any way concerned. The tantrums amuse me endlessly. But I’ve always had a thing for drunk, crazy and stupid.


      • Personally, I used to find that drunk, crazy, stupid, and female could lead to a satisfactory result, at least temporarily, but I just never saw the point in drunk, crazy, stupid, and male. But, Neal, I’m not judgmental: if it works for you, go for it.


        • It’s more of a theological thing with me. William reaffirms everything I already believe about the human spirit.

          I’m a people person!


      • I’ve always had a thing for drunk, crazy and stupid.

        That reminds me, Mom’s upset you haven’t called in a while…


      • Yes.
        It is.
        I’m not entirely sure he’s not trying to get a 3-day hold or something on purpose so he doesn’t have to admit it to himself but get the help he needs.

        But from all indications, this is just a continuation of the last 50 or so years of cycle…


        • As I alluded to above, there’s been a whole new level of crazy in the last six months.

          It’s really entertaining to watch someone’s complete mental collapse in real time.


          • It’s a Zen koan. Only Willie can collapse something that is already empty.


        • Exactly, onlooker.

          I openly questioned whether or not a death had actually occurred due to: (1) the Deranged Cyberstalker Bill Schmalfeldt’s aversion to being honest… about most anything, and; (2) his behavior was beyond startling, disturbing, and disgusting for someone who claimed they had just lost their spouse.

          Who thinks of smaller coffee pots and smart phones and Twitter accounts and new blogs during such a time?

          Who. Does. That? Just wow.


  3. BS is complaining to WordPress about this and other blogs. If WordPress contacts any of you, just send them the order dismissing his last case with prejudice. He made the same claims in that suit, or COULD HAVE MADE them, thus, res judicata.

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