SOUND: Skype rings once.
JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.
RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) Good evening, Johnny.
JOHNNY: Well, hello!
RULE 5 GIRL: (Telephone Filter) Have you been reading any of the junk Bunny Boy’s been publishing lately?
JOHNNY: Not really. What have I missed?
RULE 5 GIRL: He’s done a post about that suit against The Bomber, and some of the comments are disturbing?
JOHNNY: Really? I’ll take a look.
MUSIC: Theme up and under.
ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …
JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!
MUSIC: Theme up to music out.
JOHNNY: The following is partial extract of the tweets sent and received during my investigation of The Point of View Matter.
JOHNNY TWEETS: (SYNTH VOICE) @BunnyBoyUnread Have you ever passed a polygraph test?
JOHNNY: There’s a fairly infamous character on the Internet known as The Bomber. He got that name as a result of a conviction in federal court for a series of seemingly random bombings that terrorized a town in the midwest. He’s always been a litigious jerk. While he was in prison, he sued the widow of a victim to try to prevent her from collecting a damage judgment.
Since his second release on parole—his first parole was revoked for cheating that same widow—he’s taken to suing people who write or speak publicly about his past or his present activities. He managed to win one case by default, but has failed at every other suit he’s filed. He’s also filed bogus criminal complaints against a couple of bloggers, and one of them is now fighting back with a countersuit.
It’s patently obvious that the Bunny Boy Unread is a wholly-owned subsidiary of The Bomber’s Internet operation and that Bunny Boy, the current editor, is something of a Bomber groupie. Thus, it was not surprising to find that a *scare quotes* news *unquote* story at BBU was chock full of misrepresentations and outright lies trying to spin news about that countersuit in The Bomber’s favor.
In order to sort fact from fiction I had to sit down and slog though over three years of BBU’s BS, a period extending to before Bunny Boy became associated with the site.
JOHNNY TWEETS (SYNTH VOICE) I’m reading a backlog of @BunnyBoyUnread Wait till the clients see my expense report for brain bleach
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BBU WEBPAGE: (SYNTH VOICE) (Fading in) … his co-defendants in the litigation spurred by the 2013 divorce court shenanigans have redoubled their efforts to reach settlements with The Bomber.
JOHNNY: That’s an example of the BBU’s BS. A look at the court records shows that some of the defendants in The Bomber’s suits have settled with him. It also shows that they were unwise to do so. All the other resolutions of the claims so far have been either dismissals, summary judgments, or directed verdicts in favor of defendants. The Bomber has had a perfect record as a loser.
What makes the nonsense in the BBU post so exceptionally stupid is that it was published 11 days after The Bomber’s latest LOLsuit had been dismissed against 6 of the defendants. Anyone who looks at the record can see The Bomber’s case is failing.
BBU WEBPAGE: (SYNTH VOICE) (Fading in) … is still in a position to file criminal charges for perjury.
JOHNNY: In that article BBU’s mythical perjury claim was based on the failure of a witness being cross-examined by The Bomber to authenticate a tweet as something the witness had written. Bunny Boy tried hard to spin that as a lie by the witness. But Bunny Boy was lying, and he got caught. It turned out that the tweet in question had been reproduced in an article written by Bunny Boy and that he had properly cited the original author of the tweet.
That’s amateur’s mistake.
But it’s to be expected. The Bomber can’t keep his lies straight either.
Meanwhile, digging through that backlog brought out several leads that have pointed to hard evidence that is now in my clients’ hands. We’ll see how they use it to push back.
Oh, and about those comments that disturbed Rule 5 Girl … Yeah, those people are sick. Really sick.
JOHNNY TWEETS: (SYNTH VOICE) @TheBomber So, what do you think of pro se lawfare now?
ANNOUNCER: Now, here’s our star to tell you about next week’s intriguing episode of our story.
JOHNNY: Next time? You can’t make this stuff up. Join us, won’t you?
Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!
MUSIC: Swell theme and under
ANNOUNCER: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign, starring W. J. J. Hoge, is transcribed in Westminster. Be sure to join us next Monday, same time and URL, for the next exciting episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign.
MUSIC: Theme up to music out.
ANNOUNCER: Johnny Atsign is a work of fiction. If anyone thinks it’s about him, he should read Proverbs 28:1.
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