160 thoughts on “Prevarication Du Jour

    • bwahahahaha!

      He has such a tiny, closed view of things, it doesn’t occur to him there could possibly be any other way. Then add in his constant projection, which explains why he always thinks others have wrongful intent.

      • BS is incapable of thinking further than one step ahead. And, he wrongly assumes others suffer from the same affliction.

        BS also struggles horribly with tunnel vision. When he gets a thought or an idea rattling around in that otherwise empty noggin of his, he’s like a pitbull on a pork chop. In his demented world, there can only be one option to everything at any given moment — and, that is the one he just happened to think up.

        Our gentle host summed him up perfectly…

        Bill Schmalfeldt is an ignorant fool.

      • This is so true. After Tubby’s faildox of me, he sent a private message asking why I was using the screen name of an 18 year old kid. It never crossed his mind that me and this kid (I didn’t know even existed until then), may have the same name.

        • Young William always acts first and thinks later. There are endless examples of his filing a lawsuit, responding to one, or pleading in a peace order case, and then asking Avvo afterward.

          That’s why I love him.

  1. Twitter Attorney Smellfart parody question of the week:

    “What is my relationship to convicted bomber Brett Kimberlin?”

    a) Never heard of the guy.
    b) He’s my excellent friend who drives me to all my court appearances.
    c) Never heard of the guy, but he drives me to all my court appearances.
    d) We’re both grown adult males who write fantasies or music about underage teenage boys or girls. So yeah, we have a lot in common. I was going to ask Brett out on a date, but I get the feeling he only likes girls. Dang. I wish he knew how I really felt about him. He is the BOMB!

  2. Sure, he sent cash WHICH YOU SHOULD NEVER DO IN THE MAIL!!! but we know you have his address.

    Which we now know is a cardboard BOX on the river PO.

      • I’m sure Neal (of the multiple outstanding warrants for $57,000+ in child support due) Rauhauser can tell BS all about crypto-currencies and anonymity.

    • Or bitcoin, or manually via an agent, or a money order, and 15 other methods I can think of off the top of my head that would preserve anonymity to varying degrees.

      • Geocaching – An envelope with $5 (or a gift card, or space bucks, etc) was left in a secret location by Mr. Hoge or his agents and the GPS coordinates sent to Mr. Krendler and his agents so they could retrieve it.

        That adds some “super seekrit spy stuff” to it. LOL.

      • Donation in the name of to his favorite charity. Perhaps, a home for young zombies whose parents are not still dead.

      • I can’t hold out. I have to let everyone in on the secret

        The instructions for how the transaction was done were included in an email . That email currently resides on a personal email server . All you need to do is subpoena the owner -codenamed” Hillary”

  3. In which Twitter Attorney Smellfart ponders going on a diet:

    “… it would be nice to go a whole day without one pig…”

  4. In which the simpering moron Bill Schmalfeldt asserts that calling someone an “ignorant fool” is somehow defamatory:

    Schmalfeldt Radio @OnlineRadioSRN · 14m 14 minutes ago

    Missing the point, Hoge defames me again. Check, Cash, Wampum, don’t matter. Mailing address. Does matter.

    Willy, you blithering idiot, there is NOTHING in that post that is defamatory. Given your pathetic understanding of the legal system, I’m not surprised. Good luck with your LOLsuit though.

    • verbal instruction “payment shall be considered paid upon equivalent donation to charitable institution X”

      no check, no letter, no address. done and done, get a fork and poke yourself.

      • It’s hardly a secret that William is five-eights retarded and a borderline lunatic, but Kimberlin can’t believe this nonsense, can he?

    • No, no, no! ANYTHING that hurts Biwwwyy’s widdle feeeeeeeeewings is defamatory! ANYTHING! Swearsies!

      Oh, okay. Maybe not. But then again, I live in Realityville and The Big BM lives in, well, you know.


    • Heh. OPINION is protected speech under the 1st amendment. Wishing it wasn’t so has no effect legally. Sucks to be you Bill, butthurt still isn’t a tort. Willful violation of a court order on the other hand, can be a criminal charge.

  5. Schmalfeldt Radio @OnlineRadioSRN · 2m 2 minutes ago

    One facing two (at least) lawsuits, a peace order for stalking a teen, and poss. criminal charges should not be calling others “ignorant.”

    So says the guy stalking someone with a restraining order against him.

    I’d love to see his citations of court cases where someone was found guilty of defamation for calling someone “ignorant”.

    • Would posting pictures of someone’s child, only found by some mad googling, count as “stalking”, either of the person or their child? Asking for a friend……

    • Not only that, Bill Schmalfeldt is under a Peace Order he is under a Peace Order, in part, for interfering in the business affairs of John Hoge. Claiming John Hoge is not one of the lawful copyright holders of the work in question is yet another act of business interference on Bill Schmalfeldt’s part. You would think that after the legal jeopardy Schmalfeldt placed himself in by impersonating the President of National Bloggers Club in an unlawful attempt to seize assets, and filing false DMCA notices against John’s blog, one would think Bill Schmalfeldt would be more circumspect. The fail is strong in that one!

  6. Schmalfeldt is sounding pretty desperate. Do you think Kimberlin docks his paycheck if he can’t get Hoge to knuckle under by Friday?

    • The truly pathetic thing is that I honestly don’t believe that William is being paid a dime. I’d have marginally greater respect for him if he were. Scratch the back of his neck and rub his belly, and he’ll do anything for you. He’s just that lacking in basic dignity.

      • Dude, I’d pay $100 rather than touch him. Oh you meant metaphorically.

        No, ‘s all about the Benjamins.

      • This.

        I’m with you here, Neal. I don’t believe BS is being paid a single penny for his role as the Rectal Mouthpiece for the Domestic Terrorist Brett Kimberlin and Team Kimberlin, in general.

        Like Army Vet often points out — BS does what he does in hopes of a “Good Boy!” pat on the head by the evil goons he worships. He is just that pathetic.

      • I have a hard time believing that Schmalfeldt acts like a jackass all over the internet for free. He couldn’t be that stoopid, could he?

      • From what I’ve seen, Agile, I’d be willing to do it with the Hazmat suit and the 20′ pole, if the pole were at least a moderately pointy stick.

      • You’d probably find a few misplaced foot longs while you were prodding around that belly.

    • There’s no way someone does the Schmalfeldt monkey act every day without some form of compensation. Kimberlin’s non-profits are paying out hundereds of thousands to someone(s) to do work like this. If Schmalfeldt isn’t getting a good chunk of that payout then he truly is an absolute dumbass.

  7. Maybe if Schmalfeldt tried his favorite “jounalist” tactic on Hoge:

    “… do you want play dumb and lose your kids?”

  8. Should we point out to BS that Friday is Friday the 13th? Not a good sign for someone initiating trouble for others.

    And the stupidity of thinking that the identity of Paul Krendler has anything to do with a Peace Order hearing on behalf of a Kimberlin minor is just breathtaking (wait, thatcould be the stench arising from the trailer…).

      • I think he just looked at his latest doom clock which said “2 Days ‘X’ Hours”, forgot the importance of the ‘X’, and didn’t bother to actually see if what he said made sense without it. A simple mistake for a brain damaged troll.

      • He’s just laying down the excuse for forgetting to show up. Humiliation is that much more painful in person.

  9. I’m sorry. I am getting old now so perhaps I am a bit slow on the uptake. I had assumed that Kimberlin had requested the TRO on behalf of a minor child. I do not quite get the relevance of Krendler, copyrights, etc. to any such hearing.

    I had simply never considered that Witless Willie had requested a TRO on behalf of a female minor. Is he perhaps now claiming to be a female minor? If so, that certainly explains any interest in boy scouts.

  10. Not for nothing, but why does anyone believe that Kimberlin is going to do what his ignorant and corpulent propagandist suggests he will? From what I understand, he rarely does. For example, did anyone ever learn what was supposed to happen to Patrick Frey on the Ides of March? How many times has Schmalfeldt said “Huge developments in this case or that next week” only to be followed with nothing?

    I should note that I hesitate to call William a propagandist, since it would give Josef Goebbels a worse name than he already has.


  11. http://imgur.com/rgPki34

    So Bill calls John senile, yet expects John to be able to remember an address where he sent one piece of mail among God knows how many almost a year ago?


    Anyway, I just wanted make an on the record request to be sure that John really won’t divulge the address. Part of the agreement was that he would not, because even though I’m the only one who goes to the mailbox because it’s a block down the street and my spouse never leaves the house except for medical or legal reasons, I really don’t need another pair of Irish shades so soon after the last ones.

    • When Brett Kimberlin leaked Aaron Walker’s sealed e-mail that was all the “coaching” any thinking person needed. Anyone remotely critical of Brett Kimberlin would have to be stupid, oblivious, or cocky to leave any kind of paper trail. While Bill Schmalfeldt is all three, I doubt anyone here is. Even Bill might have noticed the dearth of material uncovered by Kimberlin in his Maryland case.

    • This kinda works the same where you coach someone to say, “OK, just so we are clear. I will send the letter. You make sure that you push hard that the signature on the letter is a forgery from this other document you gave me. Remember everything I told you, OK. You got this. I will be in the back to watch Hoge squirm when the judge realizes you are right.”

  12. I am surprised BS thinks payments can only be via check, I’m willing to venture he’d gladly accept payment in kind (footlongs and mayo.) for services rendered. (I have to go pick up some brain bleach now, I hope they accept my pieces of silver at the store.)

    • It may have been electrons, for all we know.

      There may have been other communications discussing alternate methods of payment, for all he knows. Such discussions are irrelevant to the nature and validity of the transfer of copyright.

      Also, for all anyone has seen, aside from John and myself, there may not even be an address blacked out on that document. It could be a Paypal link. It could be a link to a Google doc with an entirely different set of instructions. It could be a link to a cat video. A bit.ly link to the National Parkinson’s Foundation donation page.

      It could be the name on a grave marker in Sad Hill Cemetery.

      Could be a MacGuffin.

      Could be anything.

  13. Why not settle this by calling the $5 bill to the stand to testify. Everyone knows how honest Abe Lincoln is.

    • Well they could be the same if you ignore the differences in writing styles, interests, and personalities. Other than that, they could be the same. In which case, Hoge may be Howard and Roy too. In fact, I am checking myself carefully now to ensure that I am not a sockpuppet.

  14. the amazon federal police have ordered a global recall of all 5 dollar bills for dusting for fingerprints and dna

    • …and cocaine! Most US bills have trace amounts of cocaine on them.

      And by “bills” I mean money, not Schmalfeldt.

      But you can never tell unless you have some evidence, amirite?

    • Once the feds, and, therefore, Bill Schmalfeldt, have a sample of Paul’s what next? Is Bill Schmalfeldt going to subpoena the person with genome “A-T, A-T, G-C….?”

  15. Y’all laugh, but I’ve seen both WJJH and THE Prince of Parody (may FUN be upon him), frequently use words such as, “the,” “and,” and several others; they both use the acronym TMZ to represent Thinking Man’s Zombie; and there are many more examples if you think about it. That should be plenty to convince anyone, though a feldtchart would be helpful.

    For those hardcore skeptics, if they’re not the same person, how do you explain both of them being an obsession of a cyberstalking freakshow? Coincidence? I think not.

    • There’s a simple test to determine the validity of your hypothesis, Jane. Has Krendler ever Tweeted or commented when Hoge was in court?

      • Indeed, Father… But we should have sympathy for those afflicted with unmitigated twatwaffliosis.

        Perhaps we could start a charity dedicated to curing this horrible disease… Perhaps we could call it the “March of Fivers”?

        • Of course, everything is about phoney concern troll and noted idiot Bill “I violated the court’s order out of human concern and made it all about me” Schmalfeldt.
          Remember, Jesus himself took a bull-whip to the dishonest traders in His temple. How much more will He do to their modern day counterparts who falsely proclaim themselves His followers?

      • When I made this comment, I hadn’t seen that you, too, had referred to BS as a “twatwaffle” (a word that cracks me up everytime I see it, btw) in another thread. That word certainly describes many elements of Team Kimberlin.

        As to the rest of your comment… yeah — He is not going to be humored, nor gentle in the least. BS believes that uttering weak platitudes out of both sides of his mouth will ultimately save him. Per always… BS hasn’t a clue. BS has made it abundantly clear that he has chosen to follow and worship man.

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