Blogsmoke


BlogsmokeSOUND: MODEM CONNECTING FADES UP TO FULL MIKE—SINGLE SHOT—RICHOCHET

MUSIC: UP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 1

ANNOUNCER: (VOICE OVER MUSIC) Around Twitter Town and in the territory of the net—there’s just one way to handle the harassers and the stalkers—and that’s with an Internet Sheriff and the smell of “BLOGSMOKE”!

MUSIC: THEME HITS: FULL BROAD SWEEP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 2

ANNOUNCER: “BLOGSMOKE” starring W. J. J. Hoge. The story of the trolling that moved into the young Internet—and the story of a man who moved against it. (MUSIC: OUT)

JOHN: I’m that man, John Hoge, Internet Sheriff—the first man they look for and the last they want to meet. It’s a chancy job—and it makes a man watchful … and a little lonely.

MUSIC: MAIN TITLE—RECORDED—CUT 3

JOHN: Folks often ask me how I got to be Internet Sheriff here in Twitter Town. I ran unopposed after being nominated by Bunny Boy, the editor of a minor website. Back in November of last year, Bunny Boy wrote what he thought was a satirical piece about my efforts to enforce a peace order against a cyberthug. As usual, he got many of his facts wrong.

However, he did note that, given the then current rate of violations of the peace order, it was likely that there would have been thousands of counts standing against the violator by the time his case got to court in early 2014. He wondered, “The District Attorney and Circuit Court clerk probably do not enjoy this prospect. Will Sheriff Hoge wear out his welcome with the townsfolk and be named a vexatious litigant? Will he get called out for playing fast and loose with the rules of the court?”

Those questions deserve an answer.

Did I wear out my welcome? It doesn’t seem likely. Since Bunny Boy wrote his article, Hogewash! has had about 1.3 million page views, and the current traffic is running at a rate greater than 3 times last year’s.

Did I get named a vexatious litigant? Nope. In fact, the follow on civil matter, the extension to the peace order, was granted, and when the cyberthug tried to run an accuse-the-accuser play and charge me with perjury, his allegations were found to be without probable cause.

Did I get called out for playing fast and loose with the rules of the court? Nope. Actually, that’s what happened to the Bunny Boy’s boss.

JUDGE 1: Did you alter the return receipts between docket entry 38 and 50-whatever; did you change them? This is about the exact same brief green card being filed—the support motions you filed, the different docket entries, one showing the restricted delivery box checked and one not.

THE BOMBER: Your Honor, like I said, I asked the Post Office to send it restricted delivery.

JUDGE 1: You’re not answering my question.

THE BOMBER: Yes, I changed—

JUDGE 1: Did you change it?

THE BOMBER: Yes, I did.

JUDGE 1: And then you filed it representing that it accurately reflected the green card that had been filed out.

THE BOMBER: No, no, no, I filed it and accurately said‚it accurately reflected what I told the Post Office to do, and that’s what it is. You know, like I said, I’m a pro se litigant and—

JUDGE 1: Don’t even use that with me.

ANNOUNCER: Here in Westminster, we’re having those pleasant summer evenings when it’s nice to sit on the porch and sip a cold drink while listening to crickets and watching the lightning bugs. I’ve been sipping mine from one of the new Collateral Estoppel tea tumbler. It keeps my iced tea cool in the summer, and it will keep my tea hot this winter. It’s just one of the goodies exclusively available for you to spend your hard-earned cash on at The Hogewash Store. Stop by today, and spend some cash to support Team Lickspittle.

And now back to our story.

MUSIC: SCENE BUMPER MUSIC—RECORDED—CUT 5

JOHN: That’s not the only time that Bunny Boy’s boss has had a hard time with a judge. The Bomber is suing a couple of dozen defendants, including me, in federal court, claiming that we’re a racketeering organization formed for the purpose of defaming him. He asked the court for permission to file a preliminary injunction against several of the defendants, again including me. Then he asked for an extension of time to file the motion for the injunction so he could go on vacation.

JUDGE 2: The purpose of a preliminary injunction is to protect the status quo and to prevent irreparable harm during the pendency of a lawsuit ultimately to preserve the court’s ability to render a meaningful judgment on the merits. A preliminary injunction is either needed or it is not. If a preliminary injunction is needed, as Plaintiff contends, it ought to be pursued with the degree of diligence and urgency for which it was intended to serve i.e. the prevention of irreparable harm. Because Plaintiff’s proposed “wait-and-see” approach is antithetical to that purpose, the Court denies Plaintiff’s Request.

JOHN: Of course, Bunny Boy hasn’t written much about his boss for the past couple of weeks. Not since he lost his state lawsuit against my codefendant’s and me. The court granted us a directed verdict because there was no evidence against us.

JUDGE 3: There was absolutely no evidence in this case—exactly—to which the defendant is alleged to have done, and so I think the case falls short of the level at which it should go to the jury. For those reason the Court will enter judgment in favor of the defendants.

JOHN: No. I’m not the vexatious litigant in this scenario. And the game’s not over yet.

MUSIC: CLOSING TITLE UP AND UNDER—RECORDED—CUT 6

ANNOUNCER: (VOICE OVER MUSIC) It’s been said that truth is strange than fiction because fiction has to make sense—as we will see in the next episode of “BLOGSMOKE”!

MUSIC: SWELL AND CONTINUE TO MUSIC OUT

ANNOUNCER: The Legal Department wishes the following declaimer read: “‘BLOGSMOKE’ is a work of fiction. Anyone who feels it might be about him should read Proverbs 28:1.”

Be sure to tune in on Monday at 6 pm Eastern Time for the next intriguing episode of “Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign.” This is LBS, the Lickspittle Broadcasting System.

45 thoughts on “Blogsmoke

  1. Ah the Bunny Boy. Being wrong AND and ass hat for years now. Wonder what is up with Team Kimberlin living in their Mom’s basements?

  2. Let’s face it, Brett Kimberlin has not surrounded himself with intellectual giants. The cheerleading squad tweeting the day of the directed verdict, and again a few days later was sheer idiocy.

    • Bunny Boy flexed his “intellectual” muscles soon after news of the directed verdict broke by calling Ken White (@popehat) a pedophile.

      To quote Bugs Bunny…

      ACME Looniversity in action, my friends.

      *SMH*

  3. i have a bit of a complaint. Blogsmoke, evocative of Gunsmoke as it is, should have some gunplay. Or a blog fire. Something that produces smoke. I recommend that you monitor TDPK’s ears. And then give us the video when that pays off.

    #HowToGetAMillionHits

  4. Hmm. This post went up August 22. When did these tweets go out? Oh! August 20! That’s two days BEFORE August 22. But WJJH “started” it. He must have used the Time Machine. Oh, and this ongoing obsession with WJJH is BS’s “post-Hoge” life.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 15
    @xcitizen10 @wilsb8 @whoisnumbernone it’s the post Hoge me. Back with Twitter to push my Kickstarter project.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 20
    I don’t know if @brainsrfood is paying attention or not, but I am in the process of writing a book about the whole “Krendler Konflict”.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 20
    The subtitle is “Kraven Koward Kauses Kopyright Kourt Kaos.” I am going to use portions of his blog in the book and give him attribution.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 20
    If @brainsrfood has any objection to my borrowing the things he stole, he has time to do so. Or he can sell his entire blog to someone.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 20
    As @brainsrfood has no idea which portions I intend to use, he will have to either file an objection under his own name…

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 20
    …or sell the entire blog to someone.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 21
    It’s the story of how an anonymous coward got a right wing curmudgeon to drop nearly $1,000 to protect his right to cower in the shadows.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 21
    In the end, the coward’s benefactor spent all that money and walked away with the same deal he was offered before they went to court.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 21
    @Harada_no_hime @wilsb8 He’s been there for quite awhile cuz he’s so tuff.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · Aug 21
    @wilsb8 Blessed quiet. This book doesn’t yank any chains, but it tells my side of the story.

  5. Reader, you need to realize that nothing Willy tweets actually exists in real life. The fact he called Mr. Hoge a “right wing curmudgeon” a full TWO DAYS prior to the cyberthug comment is completely irrelevant because Willy didn’t actually write it.

    It’s like Quantum Mechanics, only a lot more stupid.

    • I also need to realize, don’t I, that quoting someone exactly is “hate speech” and “keeping things going.” Odd how not mentioning anyone by name is interpreted by some as . . . mentioning them by name. Paranoia may be a sign of a mental health issue.

      • Your cut-and-paste of Willy’s EXACT WORDS is an intentional escalation of……..well, something hateful. Even if your post was almost completely Willy’s own words.

        Cut-and-paste of Willy’s tweets=hate speech. But whose hate and speech is it?

  6. Does anybody know what Krendler did (if anthing, I don’t see any comments from him) to cause Willy to flip out and start this whole book thing the other day? Things had been completely quiet for almost a week. Then it looks like Willy just woke up one morning and yelled “KRRRRENNNNNDLLLLEEERRRR!!!!” and started cutting-and-pasting.

  7. Before Willy ran away yet again, his explanation as to why he didn’t start this is because “cyberthug” is worse than “right wing curmudgeon”.

    I’d much rather be called a cyberthug, it makes you sound badder.

    Sorry John.

  8. This is pretty much a dead thread, so I’ll post his entire Feldtdown here:

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 23m
    I’ve taken down my various websites. I need to focus on marketing my books and upcoming CD/MP3 downloads. I just have to figure out how.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 1m
    They sure are worried about me. “I just noticed his fake Drudge website is down. I wonder how much of…”

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 38s
    “…his twitter timeline will survive the current purge? — Perry Mason.” Who the fuck am I supposed to be hiding from?

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 26s
    This Twitter account will be closed by the time I go to bed tonight. I’ve already taken down my various websites.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 21s
    My facebook page is still alive at https://www.facebook.com/Lobotomy.Sandwich … The fan page is http://facebook.com/wmsbroadcasting

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 4s
    The facebook page is still operable, the fan page is https://www.facebook.com/wmsbroadcasting and the regular page is https://www.facebook.com/Lobotomy.Sandwich

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 5s
    You can find me on LinkedIn at http://www.linkedin.com/in/parkycompanion/

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 29s
    Now that I am finished with this Hoge business, I’ve written my book, it may be released tomorrow, I am redirecting.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 14s
    Everyone should just relax. If you are concerned that I may have violated any copyrights, buy a copy when it’s available. But be warned.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 10s
    I will prosecute each and every false DMCA takedown to the fullest extent of the law.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 15s
    False reviews on Amazon will also be dealt with, so, and I’m looking at you Dr. Bach and Eric Johnson, don’t do it.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · now
    The book mentions only a few people by name. Both judges. And me. “Paul Krendler” is not a real person. Hoge is not mentioned by name.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 1m
    I use NONE of Mr. Hoge’s work in the book. I have taken steps to ensure that what I do use of “Krendler’s” “work” is clearly fair use.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 1m
    Look up the words “de minimis.”

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 58s
    I have a couple comedy albums coming out as well. I will be writing more and trying to perform more as I am able.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 13s
    Mr. Hoge has assured me that he will not press his Peace Order appeal against me. I hope he was being truthful. However, it is not helpful

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 2m
    …to get one’s readers riled up into a state of fresh hate by calling me a “cyber thug.” Hoge said his readers should refrain from…

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 1m
    …”joggling my elbow” while I move on with my life. Calling me a cyber thug, John, that’s a bit more than a joggle and I resent it greatly.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 30s
    I will resurface with a new website devoted to selling my meager wares. My Twitter presence will be as much as is needed for promotion.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 20s
    I will continue to write, when inspired to do so, for Liberaland and I will post thoughts on LinkedIn as they occur to me.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 3s
    If you are upset by the fact that I’ve written a book about this whole Copyright Infringement nonsense, too bad. I lived it.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 32s
    If Mr. Hoge cares to write a book in which he tells his side of the story, I will endorse any truthful telling of the tale.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 11s
    But as I close this series of Tweets, I will ask Mr. Hoge and his readers to find someone new to hate. I am not “Team Kimberlin.”

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 4s
    There IS no “Team Kimberlin.” The whole t-shirt thing was a joke to rub your noses in the fact that you thought there WAS a TK.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 21s
    I can’t speak for my friend @wilsb8. But I think you will find him tougher than I was. And you can’t sue him or file peace orders on him.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 21s
    My friend @osborneink can take whatever you dish out and give it back in double measure.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · now
    My friend @harada_no_hime has been the consumate lady during all of this. She is kind and gentle and not deserving of trash talk.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 13s
    I have no connections whatsoever with Neal Rauhauser. And Brett Kimberlin is perfectly capable of taking care of himself.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 26s
    Therefore, I withdraw from your stupid #WAR. I want no part of it, or of you. Try to live productively, watch out for scams like Lemmen.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · now
    Be well, goodbye, and LEAVE ME ALONE! Thank you.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 27s
    This Twitter site will go dark at 9pm EDT.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 3s
    “Jesus, there always has to be a countdown. It’s always a soap opera with Willy. Just go, Willy. Nobody will mind. I promise. – Perry Mason”

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 21s
    Perry, you classless idiot. The “countdown” as you call it is to let my friends know that after 9pm ET they will not be able to Tweet me.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 27s
    Every move I make, every word I write, every action I take has an ulterior motive to you morons. You will miss me more than you know.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 18s
    Especially you, “Tapeworm.” If you actually had a blog, a Twitter account, a Facebook page, a life away from Hoge, you might be something.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 5s
    But you are a parasite, firmly attached to John’s ascending colon, feasting off the digested food that passes by you. You disgust me.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 20s
    I know that when the day comes and I do pop back up on Twitter, it will be Tapeworm who finds me, and runs to tell his Daddy.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 25s
    Those of you with my timeline in your bookmarks so you can always keep an eye on me, who then complain that I read your comments…

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 15s
    …remember the lesson of Michael Malone who spent the last months of his life embroiled in hatred. Do you think as he took his last breath,

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 11s
    …he wished he only had more time to write hate-filled blog posts directed at me? Or perhaps did he realize how much time was wasted in

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 3s
    …this wild goose chase. Learn the lesson of Hoge, who spent nearly a grand to register copyrights and file a lawsuit to “protect” the

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 23s
    …powerful and brave “Paul Krendler” who is still cowering in the shadows. And I’m supposed to be afraid of HIM? Not in this life.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · now
    If I could have one final wish it would be that stupid people would realize that being smart is better. And with that…

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 1m
    @OsborneInk Bailing on Twitter for now. I’m on Facebook and Linked in. Email is lordofsatire at gmail dot com.

    Mental Health Radio @MentalHealthRad · 21s
    @Karoli Bailing on Twitter for now. I’m on Facebook and Linked in. Email is lordofsatire at gmail dot com.

    No comment.

  9. Pingback: We Didn’t Start the Fire | The Thinking Man's Zombie

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