Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign

Johnny Atsign Logo 2ANNOUNCER: From Westminster, it’s time for—

SOUND: Skype rings once.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) Hello, Mr. Atsign. My name is Bob Cousy.

JOHNNY: Not *The* Bob Cousy who played for the Celtics. I’m a fan.

COUSY: No. Just *A* Bob Cousy. I hadn’t been born when that Bob Cousy was playing point guard. I’m calling about The Grouch.

JOHNNY: What about him?

COUSY: This has come out left field … sorry to mix my sports metaphors … but he’s suddenly started harassing my wife and me. And our baby.

JOHNNY: So why are you calling me?

COUSY: I’m told you might be helpful.

JOHNNY: Perhaps. Tell me your story.

MUSIC: Theme up and under.

ANNOUNCER: The Lickspittle Broadcasting System presents W. J. J. Hoge in the transcribed adventures of the man with the action-packed Twitter account, America’s fabulous free-lance Internet investigator …

JOHNNY: Yours Truly, Johnny Asign!

MUSIC: Theme up to music out.

JOHNNY: The following is partial extract of the tweets sent and received during my investigation of Short-Fused Dud Matter.

JOHNNY TWEETS: (SYNTH VOICE) Hey, @TheGrouch, another #faildox.

JOHNNY: The Grouch had become more strident and reckless in his tweets and blog posts as he became more isolated on the Internet. He attempted to push back against those holding him accountable for his behavior with what appeared to be a coordinated effort involving a sympathetic, but blatantly false, piece published at a website for which he had formerly written and the release of a hastily assembled ebook documenting the harassment he claimed he was being subjected to.

The ebook was mostly recycled blog posts. The bulk of them were from The Grouch’s own web rantings, but large parts of a couple of chapters were lifted from other bloggers. The ebook was available over a weekend, but by the beginning of the next week it was no longer available. It had been pulled because of a copyright complaint.

The Grouch responded by publishing a hard copy version of the ebook with a new title using a print-to-order service. That lasted about a day before it was taken down by a similar copyright complaint.

After being held to account for his copyright violations, The Grouch went into an online rage. He acted out his anger by publishing the personal information of persons who he perceived were tormenting him. That’s called “doxing” in online slang. One of the the people he doxed was Bob Cousy.

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) (Fading up.) … and then he sent emails to my wife’s employer.

JOHNNY: That’s not unusual for him.

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) What ripped it for me is when he posted a picture of our infant.

JOHNNY: Again, I’m not surprised that he would do that. Look, have you called the cops about this?

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) Yeah, our local Sheriff’s Department. They referred me to our local courts, and a judge has issued a restraining order. Or I should say, a couple of restraining orders. There’s one for my wife as well. The problem I have now is how to get this guy served. I’m in Arizona, and he’s in Maryland.

JOHNNY: You can have your sheriff fax it to the sheriff in The Grouch’s home county. I can give you the contact info. Have you got a pencil handy?

ANNOUNCER: Are you a proud member of Team Lickspittle and a fan of Johnny Atsign? You can show you support by wearing Team Lickspittle gear. The Grand Hog, Johnny Atsign, Team Lickspittle, and Res Judicata merchandise is available exclusively at The Hogewash Store. Drop by today, spend some money, and show your support for Team Lickspittle.

JOHNNY: You’d think that after being served with a pair of restraining orders The Grouch would leave the Cousy family alone, but that’s not his way. He cranked out another book and included a bunch of the doxing in it.

SOUND: Skype rings once.

JOHNNY: Johnny Atsign.

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) Mr. Atsign. You’re not going to believe what The Grouch has done.

JOHNNY: I’ll bet you calling about his new book.

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) Oh, have you seen it?

JOHNNY: Yeah. What are you going to do?

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) I own the photograph of our child. The hospital staff took it, but it was work for hire.

JOHNNY: So you’re going to file a copyright notice?

COUSY: (Telephone Filter) (Fading out.) For openers. We’ll see what other steps I have to take …

COUSY TWEETS: (SYNTH VOICE) @JohnnyAtsign Guess what’s no longer available on Amazon?

MUSIC: Theme up and under

ANNOUNCER: Now, here’s our star to tell you about next week’s intriguing episode of our story.

JOHNNY: Next week? A picture can be worth a thousand words … or up to ten years. Join us, won’t you?

Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign!

MUSIC: Swell theme and under

ANNOUNCER: Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign, starring W. J. J. Hoge, is transcribed in Westminster. Be sure to join us next Monday, same time and URL, for the next exciting episode of Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign.

MUSIC: Theme up to music out.

ANNOUNCER: Johnny Atsign is a work of fiction. If anyone thinks it’s about him, he should read Proverbs 28:1.

Be sure to tune in on Friday at 6 pm Eastern Time for the next episode of Blognet. This is LBS, the Lickspittle Broadcasting System.

64 thoughts on “Yours Truly, Johnny Atsign

  1. Reckless doxing – taken to a whole new level. So did he lie about the “no Twitter” orders from the neurologist, about his worsening condition, or everything? I’d put my money on all of the above. What a miserable existence.

    • Neurologist. Riiiiiight. From his Liberaland piece, “Tiny Chunks of News”: “Sorry. Been gone for awhile. Neurologist told me to get out of this ongoing Twitter war. He looked real serious when he said it. It was the words,”stop engaging those people, or you will die.” Very motivating.”

      It was so motivating that he stayed off for two, three days. Now WJJH has proof that BS is acting against doctor’s orders. Or, he’s lying.

      • except he started tweeting from the lobotomyradio account right after that starting May6th, protected, THEN unlocked to start shit up with Howard on Mother’s day…


  2. I wish I’d discovered this at the start. Frankly I’m confused over all the players and accusations. But it is a fun read. Thanks for the laughs. Someday (like never) I’ll try to crib together a scorecard.

    • Maybe you could start with trying to compile all of SchmalFAIL’s twitter accounts that were suspended. hahahahaha Ok, ok, ok – maybe just the accounts that were suspended this year. 🙂

  3. “Methinks” this is going to be an interesting week.
    Hey, isn’t tomorrow the cutoff day to add new parties to the state case?

  4. So that’s why Bill’s going after the Candidate Photo information so badly now.

    He’s SOL on that one too. He’s trying to claim that if a person didn’t take the photo personally on his/her own camera, he/she can’t own the rights to it. I guess that means that if there are any photos of his wedding to Gail, they are free and clear for anyone to use for any purpose whatsoever too, because He and Gail have no rights to them, because they obviously didn’t take the photos themselves.

    • There are such photos, at least one that I’m aware of. Keep in mind that his delicate sensibilities are offended, despite his using as his avatar/ background page on Twitter, the photoshopped photos of Hoge, Ali, McCain, and Walker.

      He is now claiming that Howard is Chris Heather, after defaming and harassing an innocent family for weeks.

    • That’s an interesting position to take on photography copyright. It’s wrong, but interesting.

      If I was generous, I’d argue that he is confusing several different types of copyright that can come into play over the existence of a photo. For most of us, the only person who holds all the copyrights is the person who took the picture. In a work for hire situation, several people may end up with copyrights.

      But I’m not generous. I suspect he isn’t confused at all. At least about this.

    • And it’s a crappy apology, since it still accuses the Causeys of perjury in their applications for restraining orders.

    • I am pretty sure it’s too late for apologies on that one. He doxed a BABY. He targeted a baby. He photoshopped a skull onto a baby’s head. He’s a scumbag.

      And one last thing: Bill Schmalfeldt needs to STOP contacting me.

      • He won’t. But you knew that. In the Dungeons and Dragons reality of some middle aged men, you are the crux of the conspiracy. Your middle name isn’t Team Themis, is it?

      • Um, WTF with the “Dungeons and Dragons” stuff?

        Schmalfeldt wouldn’t have been allowed in any D&D group I’ve ever seen. He’s a nasty, unpleasant person you couldn’t stand to be around for more than 10 minutes.

    • I’d never recommend going directly to that site unless you practice safe computing. Preferably in multiple layers.

  5. OK, well I see Willy has gone off the side of the cliff.

    The only question now is how big the crater is going to be.

    Just wow.

    • For those who are puzzled by a deranged cyberstalker’s behavior, follow along. Yes, you, FOCUS!

      Don’t you find it odd that,

      1. A thrice-married man, who claimed that his first two wives cuckolded him,
      2. Left his children from both marriages to be raised by others,
      3. Whined that his second wife’s parents had thrown him out of the house,
      4. So instead of staying put and being present for his kids, he ran away to play Convoy on the highways of America,
      5. And who stalked a family in Texas, claiming that his purely speculative concerns about domestic abuse involving children, warranted filing reports against that family with CPS,
      6. Would ridicule another man’s masculinity and make fun of a domestic abuse situation that warranted court involvement?

      I, myself, find it odd. But that’s just me.

    • Just to review, of what importance is your identity to Señor Neckroll? Are you an international jewel thief? Are you selling nuclear technology? Are you Patient Zero with some deadly new disease? Or did you simply, and in fact, inflict butthurt upon poor Blob?

      • Inspector Jiggles fancies himself a righter of imaginary wrongs. He seeks to find one’s identity for one purpose only. To terrorize and harass. He obviously has no qualms about calling your home, your employer or anyone else that will tolerate his nonsense.
        He looks to inflict hardship. Perhaps due to his unremarkable existence he feels severe envy of anyone NOT HIM.
        He is only good for the LULZ!

  6. Suggestion for a new item in the Hogewash commissary: products that say, “I am Howard Earl.”

  7. What is the root cause of this incredibly self-destructive, antisocial, vile behavior? How does one align himself with a convicted perjuring bomber and yet attempt to claim the moral high ground while stooping to the such absolutely vile behavior?

    Mental illness or evil? Or both? And is that synonymous with the modern “progressive” movement?

    • I have to disagree with our esteemed host in stating it would require only one hit for an American League pitcher to have a better batting average than Bill Schmalfeldt has at doxing. Because of the DH rule, American League pitchers only bat during inter-league games played away. That might only be a couple of games a year, with fewer than a dozen at-bats. An American Leaguer with no hits might be batting 0-10. Bill Schmalfeldt is batting something on the order of 0-100. Furthermore, a pitcher with no hits might have laid down a bunt that advanced a runner, advanced a runner with a sacrifice fly, or put the ball into play on a run-and-hit play. Bill Schmalfeldt has accomplished nothing other than humiliating himself.

      • He had accomplished one good thing. Bringing even MORE attention to his “friend” Brett Kimberlin. The bombing, perjuring crap weasel that he is

  8. For a “journalist”/”investigative reporter” who swears that he has never written anything he couldn’t prove, here’s yet another bit of proof that his definition of “true” bears no resemblance to how the rest of us understand the word.

    I suspect that Hell will freeze over before he ever admits he claimed coming in 300 votes ahead of another candidate was “coming in horribly last” solely so he could mock someone as a failure.

      • Sorry – it’s the link to an image on Twitter I put up to prove yet another time that CB is a lying sack of suppurating boils.

      • Oh, and I’d never send anyone to PO, given that even even if there’s no malware etc, its a POS cesspool. I’d have to really hate someone to give them a link there without a warning!

    • Sorry….I didn’t think you would send someone there, but I got afraid to hit links when I got sent to PO from a link here the other day.

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