76 thoughts on “Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


  1. I won’t get a copy to check…but anyone would have guessed that Cabin Boy is too stupid not to keep his story straight and nonincriminating.


    • CGCB (Cuckolded Gobbler Cabin Boy) is the greatest legal mind that this country has ever produced and he “don’t need no stinking paralegal!…….No…..wait Brett! I didn’t mean it that way! It’s those damn lickspittles again! Brett!!! Wait!!”

      “Mommy!!”

      Boom!


    • “As his disease worsened, the pressure increased, leaving Schmalfeldt unable to do much more than speak a sentence at a time without coughing, making it necessary for him to use a rolling walker in his home and a wheelchair outside.”

      Pity party, anyone?


      • All someone needs to do to prove him wrong in this instance is post the video he posted a month or so ago. He blathered on for 15 minutes without a problem.


      • In the third person yet. Writing about himself as if a third party really puts the lie to your narcissism n’est–ce pas?


      • Sorry, that should have been “Writing about yourself as if a third party really puts the lie to your narcissism n’est–ce pas?”

        (there really needs to be an editor available to regular commentors … perhaps registration as a contributor via adding a registered user in the WordPress dashboard?)


    • In 24-48 hours:

      Mr. Schmeckleeater,

      In many cases, both hard-copy and electronic books and media are presented to a select group of individuals as a means of gauging demographics for advertising and other purposes…….

      You poor, dumb bastard.


  2. From Smashwords interview. “Part of Bill’s irritable nature may stem from the fact that he has Parkinson’s disease.”
    I love weasel wordings and this one’s a classic. It may indeed stem from PD. Of course it may also stem from being a huge Gomer, but its not our place to decide those little details.


  3. From the Hall of Bad Writing:
    “After an extensive six month investigation, Bill’s previous books are available on Amazon in Kindle and Paperback.”
    A precious display of a completely irrelevant subordinate clause. Guesses who wrote this gem? Smashwords or TLFKAD? Yeah, I thought so too. Remember, “the last six as a writer/editor with the federal government,”. It explains so much. if it were more than just a fever dream.


  4. I was flipping pages at the Smashwords sample (why? cuz I like hearing about me and thought sure I’d pissed him off enough for a mention at least), and found an amusing bit on p42.
    Remember all his excuses about not being able to do some surrilous thing because his pwer was out during Hurricane Sandy? Page 42 “Conveniently, that’s when Dan lost his power during the hurricane.” and ol Dumbass just keeps truckin’ on with sooper dooper investigatable SPJ-certified Jounomalism and never once gets held up or slowed down by any of that nasty old weather.

    “SHOW ME EVEN ONCE WHERE I LIED!!!” right there. focus baby focus.


    • Thanks to Frankie for posting this in a previous thread. Proof that Willy lies like a rug. He has stated in his “book”, ““As his disease worsened, the pressure increased, leaving Schmalfeldt unable to do much more than speak a sentence at a time without coughing:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBuTdY-lHSU

      He just doesn’t care about the truth.


    • More total disregard for the truth. On April 14th he tweeted:

      Bill Schmalfeldt ‏@PatOmbudsman Apr 14
      Dimwit Doggy:

      You do realize that I took my timeline private for Feb and most of march, right? pic.twitter.com/pmkAzqRVHa

      Now, anybody who was here during those months knows that is a bald-faced lie.

      As a single example of many, here is a post of John’s which has a screenshot of a tweet of Willy’s from Feb. 22nd.

      http://hogewash.com/2014/02/22/fraudulent-comments/


    • And the lies keep on coming!!!

      Bill Schmalfeldt ‏@PatOmbudsman 13m
      And, as a result, they assure me they are going to review Hoge’s standing as an Amazon Associate.

      Yet in the discussion with the Amazon associate (leaving aside where he tells Willy that “I can assure you it is not possible to steal a book from the Amazon website”) there is absolutely NO DISCUSSION by the associate concerning John’s website:

      https://twitter.com/PatOmbudsman/status/457904932297789441

      He lies as easily as he talks.


      • Again;

        In 24-48 hours:

        Mr. Schmeckleeater,

        In many cases, both hard-copy and electronic books and media are presented to a select group of individuals as a means of gauging demographics for advertising and other purposes…….

        You poor, dumb bastard.


      • Well, a certain subset of Amazon Prime members are invited to review new, about to be released books. That most certainly isn’t theft. Amazon is also not in the habit of removing reviews, no matter how negative, from these invited reviewers, especially at the author’s demand.
        I note that Mr. Hoge is in no danger as Amazon earns more dollars from him per annum through his association than it does from Bill. (Plus the fact Amazon knows extremely well that owners of internet sites are not responsible for the content of a comment section as long as it complies with posted guidelines).
        Another #Fail.
        Bill, a GAZILLION? Really? How utterly infantile. One subpoena is a disaster for you, a dozen is an apocalypse. Remember how bad stress is for you, pull back and desist this lunacy, all you are doing is committing slow suicide.


  5. Hey, Gobbles!

    Cross examination’s gonna be a bitch!!

    Gonna be some real ‘biggies’ in yer Depends, fer sure, fer sure.

    ‘Hammer down’


    • On top of everything else, Gobbles has earned the title of

      “SNITCH”

      the lowest form of life.

      “Better be sure”


  6. I’m looking forward to see what kind of legal actions against Oedipal Bill might result from his irrational idiotic writings. Maybe the Oedipal Troll’s book title should read “How My Journalistic Suicide Led To My Incarnation” Like Tao says, “Cross examination’s gonna be a bitch!!”


    • Heh. “Incarnation”? You mean “incarceration”. I don’t think Willy’s even close to divinity. 😉

      Hey, it is Easter morning.


    • There is liability. Which is why their agreement allows them to remove the book on those grounds and/or recover any losses from the author.

      Such removals are far from uncommon.


  7. You see what happens Willy? You lie so often and effortlessly that nobody believe a word you say!


    • I listed three out and out lies on your part, yet the best you can do to address these falsehoods is yell “shut up”.

      Not surprising, really.


      • Fatboi will always lie because the truth, for him, requires work. It easier to make crap up and spew than actually find facts. That’s too hard for his small brain to grasp!


  8. And remember, death is not an option:

    Spend $5 now to read a truly god-awfully written “book” for the promise of a libel lawsuit later;

    or

    chop of three fingers with a dull hatchet?

    Can you tell I watched “Escape From Alcatraz” recently?


  9. Oh dear:

    Bill Schmalfeldt ‏@PatOmbudsman 49m
    So much Lickspittle hatred for such a sacred morning.

    Willy celebrates this scared morning thusly (leaving out the F-bombs):

    Bill Schmalfeldt ‏@PatOmbudsman 11m
    I didn’t yell, Puzio. I demanded. Shut up, you pimple on the buttocks of humankind. Nobody likes you and you smell.

    Bad day for your multiple personality disorder to act up, huh?

    And that isn’t my name. You’re going to piss a completely uninvolved person off.


  10. embryriddlealum wrote:
    “Please fins where I said the word, “steal”. Of course you can’r Shakey.”

    Of course he can’t. No matter how many times he repeats the accusation, and CAPITALIZES the word, and ELEVENTYS!!1!! all over his keyboard… stealing his “book” was NEVER mentioned.

    Poor, dumb bastard, indeed. Give it up already. *smh*


  11. You know the author photograph that is often included on the dust jacket?

    You know what that photo is called?

    A “head shot.”

    As a 63 year old man from Blue Island, Illinois with a weapons training permit, who also happens to have been dead for two and a half years, I find that an amusing coincidence.

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