Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

RICOMadnessTake a look at this from the first paragraph of The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s latest pleading in his Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness.ECF 119-1TDPK has named Twitchy as a defendant in his proposed second amended complaint, but the court does not yet consider Twitchy a part to the lawsuit. The court list the parties on PACER. The list is in alphabetical order. Here’s an extract of the list.Parties
If Twitchy were on the list, it would be listed between The Franklin Center and Aaron Walker.

#Fail

31 thoughts on “Team Kimberlin Post of the Day


  1. BK Adoption agency and in conjunction with Just Touch My Parts production present an exciting new product

    Learn to speak Ukrainian

    Comrade B will bring you fluent on such useful phrases as:

    “How old is your little sister”
    “I’m bigger than I look”
    “I am a modeling scout”

    Comrade K will guide you through the maze of immigration paperwork in the Ukraine with even more helpful phrases:

    “go ahead and sign no one reads these forms”
    “Its not a marriage certificate its a modeling license”
    “look the other way Mr. immigration officer, here is 500 Euros and some pictures”
    “now tell everyone you are 18 got it!”

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    • Haha, this is one of my favorite posts you’ve made here. The little terrorist diddler deserves our derisive laughter.


      • its just a complete work of fiction any similarities to any organization or person is purely a coincidence


    • I damn near fell out of my chair and spit my coffee on my keyboard! Now that’s funny! Great job, EPWJ!


    • (Phonetic Ukrainian examples)
      “How old is your little sister” = “Skilʹky rokiv vashomu sestrychka ”
      “I’m bigger than I look” = “YA bilʹshe , nizh ya z neterpinnyam ”
      “I am a modeling scout” = “YA modelyuvannya rozvidnyk ”
      “go ahead and sign no one reads these forms” = “Yty vpered i pidpysaty nikhto ne chytaye tsi formy ”
      “Its not a marriage certificate its a modeling license” = “Tse ne svidotstvo pro shlyub yoho litsenziya modelyuvannya”
      “look the other way Mr. immigration officer, here is 500 Euros and some pictures” = “Dyvytysya v inshyy bik pan immihratsiynoyi sluzhby , osʹ p’yat·sot yevro i deyaki fotohrafiyi”
      “now tell everyone you are 18 got it!” = “Zaraz hovoryty vsim vy visimnadtsyatʹ rokiv otrymav yoho ! “


  2. This post on Just Touch My Parts is a parody any similarities to current or past events or people is strictly a coincidence


    • I like this series. Hey, I know a wannabe music promoter who used to run import/export businesses. I bet you could help him with marketing his music performances to the public.


      • Even in Ukrainian Op Critical (Букет створює ідіот жопи) is laughable.


  3. I think in sales it is called “the assumptive close.” When the salesperson says “How would you like to pay for this…” Kimberlin figures if he says it enough, then it will be true. It doesn’t work in law, or at least shouldn’t. But since there are no sanctions on his misbehavior he can lie all he wants.

    Until of course, his lying ruins the case for him. As Instapundit says “Faster,please.”


  4. I read the partial transciptions from yesterday’s hearing at Aaron’s. Kimberlin is unbelievable in every possible way it is to be unbelievable. The judge is on to him, but this just killed me “I hope you’re aware, if you weren’t before, you are aware now, and you do not alter anything you file with this court…”

    Because no one who knows Brett Kimberlin’s history with inauthentic documents over the past 30 years wouldn’t know he understands *very well*, *exactly* what he is doing and that he is counting on people not knowing his history to get away with it.

    Also Aaron mentioned BK’s sartorial choices for this hearing being. Do you think for a minute that was sloppiness on his part? it was as calculated as his choice of outerwear. He knows how to cut his hair and buff his shoes and knot a tie and show up looking like someone ought to be paying him $300 an hour to dispense “resourcefulness” and legal expertise and sometimes he desires very much to create that impression, event to the point of boasting his peerage with anyone on the bar. Yesterday was not that day, though, and he was before a judge who hadn’t seen him before. Yesterday was strictly Pro-se hapless underdog, trying hard but makin’ mistakes, natural, harmless, well-meant mistakes. So suit, but no tie; white socks and loafers, untrimmed hair – the underdog. With the YALE logo to flash his duper’s delight.


    • I think she was on to him:

      “Alright, I am not going to dismiss this case because it’s just going to be a way to start this all over again”

      You’ve got to at least start thinking the words “dismissed with prejudice.”


  5. “I never had to pay a fee for restricted delivery before”

    I can easily believe he’s never paid it.


  6. “I’ve sent literally fifty or a hundred of these things and I have never once paid for restricted delivery.”

    To get restricted delivery in US mail, you have to pay for it. There is no other way to get it from the USPS.

    So how many times has he helpfully altered his fifty or a hundred green cards? Has anyone made restricted delivery an issue before? What other exhibits might exist to show he’s done it before?


  7. It’s even possible BK has been scolded in open court before about alteration of documents provided the court – exhibits, pleadings, etc. Perhaps even specifically instructed to be aware that he should alter nothing he files with the court . . .

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