Irony Alert

The Cabin Boy™ writes this about some advice he has received—P-O20140416Leaving aside the fact that the “harassment” the Cabin Boy™ thinks he has experienced was actually pushback against the harassment he has dished out, it’s interesting to see that Howard County’s idea of the equal protection of the laws is to tell him the essentially the same thing that they told the Walker family when they sought protection from Schmalfeldt’s online harassment.

Ooooooh, Noooooo!

The Cabin Boy™ seems fascinated with this picture.MrBillConsidering that my first name is William …

The Weakness of Lies

The Cabin Boy™ has made the extravagant claim that I’ve published a thousand “hate” posts about him since February, 2013. A search of this blog turned up 520 posts that mention him since 3 September, 2012, and none before that. The Cabin Boy’s™ response was that I must need new software for the site. Perhaps, but I am given to understand that runs on the latest stable version of WordPress.

Still, I wondered if I was missing something in my search, so I began checking the posts Schmalfeldt claimed were about him. This one caught my eye.P-OLink2HogewashFirst, it’s from before February, 2013.

Second, it doesn’t seem to mention Schmalfeldt.ThePowerOfTruthAt least, it doesn’t unless the Cabin Boy™ is admitting to being a member of Team Kimberlin (but The Dread Pirate Kimberlin says it’s defamatory to say Team Kimberlin exists) or is admitting to being Mr. Down Twinkles. Or both. (You can check out the post with its comments here.)

There are some folks who would do well to read that original post.

Truth wins in the end.

In Re Case No. 5T00087071

This morning I met with an Assistant State’s Attorney from the Howard County State’s Attorney’s Office. The subject of our meeting was the disposition of the charge of failure to obey a peace order against Bill Schmalfeldt.

My meeting had certain similarities and certain differences compared to the meetings concerning Bill Schmalfeldt that Aaron Walker and Lee Stranahan had with that office.

The principal difference was that the prosecutor was polite and respectful of me. His conduct was at all times professional.

The principal similarity was that the decision to drop the charge had been irrevocably taken before the meeting. This is troubling because the purpose of the meeting was to provide evidence not contained in the charging document so that a proper decision could be made. Evidence apparently was to have no bearing on the disposition of the case.

I am disappointed.


520 < 1000

While I was off living in the real world this afternoon, the Cabin Boy™ was demonstrating that his math skills are as poor as his reading comprehension.P-O20140406

First, October, 2012 was only about a year-and-a-half ago—as I have noted.

Second, a word search of this blog shows that there are 520 posts that contain the word “Schmalfeldt,” including this one.SchmalfeldtSearch#Desperation

You Keep Using Those Words …

… I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

Perjury. Extortion. Reasonable Belief. Harassment. These are words with well defined meanings in law. Regardless of the apparent likeness, the Cabin Boy™ is not Humpty Dumpty, and he cannot bend these words to fit his imagination. He can rant on Twitter and his blog all he wants. It won’t change the law, and it won’t change the facts.

While I will still probably take note of Schmalfeldt’s nonsense and offer occasional corrections, the Gentle Reader should understand that my real engagement with the issues relating to the Cabin Boy’s™ behavior has been and still is with the appropriate authorities. I’m not in a position to say any more than that for now. The Gentle Reader may draw his own conclusions about things based on what has and has not happened.

Meanwhile, I’ve had enough of the Cabin Boy for today, and there’s still spring cleaning that needs to be done around stately Hoge Manor.

Bonus Prevarication Du Jour

Here’s the sort of nonsense that the Cabin Boy™ is tweeting on his protected Twitter account:PBT20140406Well, let’s see who’s lying.

Here is my answer to his petition for writ of certiorari. It does not even mention Parkinson’s Disease.

Perhaps he means my answer to his motion for reconsideration of the Court of Appeals denial of a stay of the peace order pending appeal. Here are his motion and my answer. In his paragraph 8 he alleges that his Parkinson’s Disease makes travel to Westminster impractical. My answer denies that based on evidence of scheduling arrangements he had already made. I didn’t deny that he had Parkinson’s Disease, I denied the level of incapacitation he claimed—based on evidence.


UPDATE—I denied that the Cabin Boy™ was so incapacitated that it was impractical for him to appear in court for a hearing on his own motion to amend the peace order, and, behold, he appeared in court on 16 October at the hearing. That tends to confirm my analysis.

UPDATE 2—I’m informed that Schmalfeldt has a laundry list of questions I “must” answer over at Patriot-Ombudsman.


He just doesn’t understand that he has no standing as the Grand Inquisitor of the Interwebz, and that no one owes him any answers about anything.

Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ seems to be losing his grip on reality. He’s published the following over at Patriot-Ombudsman (No, I won’t link to it.)—P-O20140405I have never claimed that Bill Schmalfeldt is faking or exaggerating his Parkinson’s Disease. Indeed, I have suggested that he may be failing to recognized how profoundly it might be affecting him. Last October, I raised the possibility that he was experiencing the onset of Parkinson’s dementia. Just a couple of months ago, Schmalfeldt admitted to the onset of dementia in a letter to Judge Grimm when he tried to stick his nose into The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin’s RICO Madness. (Scroll down to the bottom of the second page.)

I believe that Bill Schmalfeldt has a serious medical condition. I’m not competent to diagnose it, but his symptoms seem consistent with Parkinson’s Disease with the onset of dementia. However, that does not provide any cover for his behavior. He began his acting out years ago and began harassing me over a year-and-a-half ago, so his present condition has no bearing on his culpability for his past actions.

Deep in the Heart of Taxes

So the Cabin Boy™ has posted his 2013 IRS Form 1040A over at Patriot-Ombudsman (No, I won’t link to it.) (H/T, EPWJ). Notice that he claims that he had no taxable income last year.Screen-Shot-2014-04-05-at-1.03.15-PM

Now, that’s quite interesting. During our mediation session last January, he admitted that he received “donations” to his tip jar, but there’s nothing on line 7 reporting those “tips.”

Either he was lying to me, or he’s lying to the IRS. Of course, the tip jar income may be so small that he has no tax liability. Still, the form is signed under the following declaration:

Under penalties of perjury, I declare that I have examined this return and accompanying schedules and statements, and to the best of my knowledge and belief, they are true, correct, and accurately list all amounts and sources of income I received during the tax year.


Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy’s™ claims that he no longer had access to his email account after September, 2012.PBT210403291332Z

On 6 December, 2012, Schmalfeldt published a post entitled While Stranahan Offers Rewards for Imaginary Threats, We File Complaint for Real Internet Crime. As of last night, the post was still up at Breitbart Unmasked (No, I won’t link to it) (H/T, @stephensheiko). That post contains this:BU20121206


UPDATE—Lest the Gentle Reader think the Cabin Boy™ simply made a typo once on 6 December, he included the same sentence in a post called While Stranahan Offers Rewards for Imaginary Threats, We File Complaint for Real Internet Crime the next day. Oh, and don’t think that the second occurrence was a matter of cut-and-paste. He also published the following in a post called Take Heart, Fools! Stranahan is Spending Your Money WISELY on the 7th:BU20121207


UPDATE 2—StephenSheiko201403311104ZHeh.

UPDATE 3—The Cabin Boy™ is still trying to claim that he wasn’t using the account past mid September.PBT201403311052ZNow, it may be true that his “friends” can’t find any of his emails, but suppose that one or more of his ex-friends kept such emails.

From: [redacted]
Date: Tuesday, September 25, 2012 11:28 AM
To: The Liberal Grouch <>
Subject: Re: question

Copy …

On Tue, Sep 25, 2012 at 11:27 AM,The Liberal Grouch <> wrote:
Stand by.

From: [redacted]
Date: Tuesday, September 25, 2012 11:23 AM
To: Old Liberal Grouch Account <editor@liberalgrouch.c= om>
Subject: question

How can I register for a login at the Patriot-Ombudsman?



UPDATE 4—Mmmmm. Trader Joe’s Caramel Popcorn for breakfast.

UPDATE 5—Last, but not least, it should not be surprising that some of Schmalfeldt’s adversaries have saved emails. Note the date.

Date: Fri, 19 Apr 2013 21:24:48 -0400
Subject: On the subject of swatting,
From: Bill Schmalfeldt <>
To: Aaron Worthing <[redacted]>
CC: “Tae H. Kim” <>

Mr. Walker.

I believe a judge has thrown out the case where I was accused of sending a swatting message. Therefore, there is no evidence I have swatted anyone, and I am telling you I have never swatted anyone. If you value your meager possessions, you will henceforth refrain from saying, suggesting, inferring or intimating that I have ever been directly or indirectly responsible for swatting anyone. I am sending a copy of this notice to my attorney ,Mr. Tae Kim, who ate your lunch in Howard County recently as you will recall.

I have never swatted anyone, have never been involved in the swatting of anyone, and have never had foreknowledge of anyone’s impending swatting. Your next inference that I have been responsible for such reprehensible behavior had better be accompanied by proof, or you will be considered to have willfully, with malice and forethought, libeled me in a public place.

Do we understand each other? In fact, I believe I insist on an apology and a statement that you have no knowledge that I have ever been involved in swattinganyone. Pleaseensurethatthisapologyissenttomeviae-mail, with a copy to Mr. Kim, and is posted publicly on Twitter.

Thank you. Bill Schmalfeldt

Copy to Tae Kim

UPDATE 6—Of course, the email to Aaron Walker is from rather than just plain—another example of the Cabin Boy’s™ multiple (Internet) personality disorder. BTW, it appears that Schmalfeldt wants to surplus that domain.LG4SaleHowever, that’s not the case. The domain is now owned by a cybersquatter.

Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ is running out of straw men to argue against.P-O20140327a

Taking the last bit first, it’s been demonstrated that the IP address in question was not associated during 2012 with the Brazilian website he keeps mentioning.

Schmalfeldt is also lying about the relative timing between when the SWATting comment was sent and damage from Sandy.SWATcommentAs can be seen above, the comment came in at 12:29 in the afternoon. Sandy came ashore around 8 pm in New Jersey. Most of the damage to Baltimore Gas & Electric’s distribution system occurred north of Baltimore beginning in the late afternoon. (Howard County, which is south of Baltimore, was relatively lightly hit.) The Gentle Reader should also note that the Cabin Boy™ never claims that he lost either power or Internet connections, or, if he did, he never says when the loss occurred.

Oh, and one more thing …

LGbylineatBU20121030The Cabin Boy™ says that he had abandoned before the date the SWATting comment was sent. Yet, he was promoting it in his byline at Breitbart Unmasked on 30 October, 2012, the day after the comment was sent. Indeed, he continued to promote it in his byline there until 25 November.

Liberal Grouchiness

One of the Cabin Boy™ many noms de cyber is “The Liberal Grouch.” In fact, he has used as one of his blogs. Here’s the current registration data for that domain:

Whois Server:
Referral URL:
Name Server: NS89.WORLDNIC.COM
Name Server: NS90.WORLDNIC.COM
Status: clientTransferProhibited
Updated Date: 23-aug-2013
Creation Date: 23-aug-2013
Expiration Date: 23-aug-2014

Notice that the creation date shown is in August, 2013. Schmalfeldt originally used a different registrar. Here is an earlier record:LGreg201303

One can see from this record that the domain was registered in May, 2012, and had functional hosting in March, 2013. This is confirmed by the domain’s hosting history.LGhosting

Notice that the IP Address History shows that the domain was hosted at briefly in August, 2013. The website was up for a few days but was taken down by the host for Terms of Service violations. However, looking back to the original hosting, it was active until May, 2013.


Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ is trying spin up a story to contradict the documentary evidence of his behavior.P-O20140328aI have never alleged that Schmalfeldt used on the day I received that SWATting threat. I have never alleged that he hijacked a Brazillian website. Those are straw men he attacks rather than confront actual evidence. What I have said thus far is that there is evidence that communications originating from Schmalfeldt were routed through the IP address in question.

Speaking of actual evidence, here’s some evidence that the Cabin Boy™ was using his Liberal Grouch persona in October, 2012.LGemail20121010The fact that he was using that email address in October, 2012, tends to confirm its use associated with a blog post.

If any law enforcement personnel would like to review the evidence package, I will gladly provide them a copy. My contact information can be found here.

UPDATE—While he’s creating his “explanation” of why I’m either lying or very stupid, the Cabin Boy™ also might want to address both of the comments that arrived minutes apart from the same IP address.swatthreatTheothercommentBoth of the email addresses listed were real email addresses of persons associated with the spoofed websites. However, the ktrainor59 address belonged to someone other than Stacy McCain.

popcorn4bkNow, as far as I’m concerned, the Cabin Boy™ can rant all he wants about this subject, but I don’t intend to have anything further to add.

He will do what he does.

If you run out of popcorn, click here.


Déjà Vu

I was scrolling through one of the Cabin Boy’s™ screeds over at Liberaland (Yes, that’s an active link. Colmes runs a safe site.), and I saw something that looked familiar. It was the avatar of one of the pro-Cabin-Boy™ commenters. I went looking through some files, and, sure enough, I found another use of that avatar.avatars

The use of the avatar shown on the left is from a comment made during the autumn of 2012 at a now-defunct website. The one on right is from the current Liberaland comments.


UPDATE—The Cabin Boy™ seems to think that I need to explain the provenance of the avatar on the left. I don’t.

First, if anyone in law enforcement wants to see the source documentation, they have but to ask. I will cheerfully assist them with their inquiry. Indeed, it may be that a copy of the source document is already in the hands of a law enforcement agency.

Second, Schmalfeldt knows when he was using the Liberal Grouch persona and the email address when he was commenting on blogs in late 2012. He knows where he made comments. And he can guess who gave me that information. What he doesn’t know is what else I have, and that should be a matter of concern for him and his associates.

I Don’t Think the Cabin Boy™ Likes Me

P-O20140328It’s interesting that Bill Schmalfeldt seems to feel that I want to see him and his buddy Brett Kimberlin sent to jail. What I want is to see them brought to justice along with the other members of Team Kimberlin. Now, it’s possible that jail could be a part of that, but that’s not my call. There are other possibilities, and I’ll leave those decisions for the proper authorities.

Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

Here’s another ludicrous allegation from the Second Amended Complaint that The Dread Pro-Se Kimberlin is trying to file in the Kimberlin v. The Universe, et al. RICO Madness. It’s from paragraph 76.ECF 100-1-76I assume that the reporter referenced above is the same “reporter” TDPK wrote about in one of his previous rants. That would be the Cabin Boy™. If the Gentle Reader believes that Bill Schmalfeldt has received any bona fide death threats, he may also be interested in the purchase of a bridge.

Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ keeps up his whining about the lack of intersection between his narrative and the real world in a post at Patriot-Ombudsman (No, I won’t link to it.) called Powerless in Howard County. He includes the following comment about me.P-O20140327What I do ain’t rocket science. It’s applied quantum mechanics.

“Rocket science” involves simple Newtonian physics. Quantum mechanics is a much more sophisticated discipline, and the suggestion that I am employed doing less advanced work borders on defamation.

Bonus Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ put a post up last night over at Patriot-Ombudsman (No, I won’t link to it.) called Hoge Has Big Trouble Brewin’.P-O20140325aIf anything is cooking, it must be on the back burner because I haven’t had any “official visitors” yet. Also, as of 4:55 pm ET this afternoon, there was still nothing new on the Maryland Judiciary Case Search about me either.


Prevarication Du Jour

The Cabin Boy™ still seems to be getting his legal advice from Acme.P-O20140325No, I’m not. 47 U.S.C. § 230 is explicit in the protection that it offers. The Cabin Boy™ and his legal “experts” are trying to force fit a set of cases that involved websites that implicitly encouraged defamatory postings. This site explicitly bans them.

The Cabin Boy™ often trips over such fine points of law as he did when couldn’t understand that the Cassidy decision is about messages posted for general view as opposed to messages sent to a particular person. Judge Stansfield patiently explained that to Schmalfeldt on two occasions, and the Court of Appeals declined to hear his appeal, but he still doesn’t believe it.

Prevarication Du Jour

PBT201502231516ZThe Cabin Boy™ is correct in assuming that he won’t get answers to the questions he posed this morning, but he has the reason wrong. His questions could be answered honestly—not that he’d like the honest answers—but they won’t be because no one owes him any answers.

The honest answers to his questions are patently obvious. It may be an amazing lack of self-awareness that prevents him from knowing the answers. Or he may know them and is dishonestly trying to deflect responsibility for his actions and their consequences.


Team Kimberlin Post of the Day

bkepoxyYou know, there may be a limit to how low the Cabin Boy™ is willing to stoop.

So far as I can tell, he’s never played any of Brett Kimberlin’s “music” on any of his Internet radio feeds.

BTW, Amazon still offers a few new and used copies of The Dread Performer Kimberlin’s last album Epoxy: Nothing Else for as little as $1.08.